Is It Not To Melt?

Originally uploaded by DigiGirl.

I love Seattle. I adore my wonderful family and the amazing friends I have here. I love my routine, my house, my bed, my coffee pot. As I flew home yesterday, and the plane dropped below the clouds, I sighed with happiness as I saw evergreens instead of palm trees swaying in the breeze. And today, even though that breeze now has knives in it that cut through layers with a reminder that winter isn't quite over yet, I love this town and this life I've made here.

And yet, after four days spent becoming totally smitten with this amazing munchkin and her equally wonderful parents (and feet!), I am bereft, longing for the easy connection and everyday interaction that comes from living in close proximity to the people you love most. We're both blessed and cursed by our mobility and the technology that allows, and sometimes requires, us to pull up roots and sink them where they can't intertwine with their kin.

So since I am rooted in the north, and she is a girl of the south (though thank goodness we're both west!), I'll have to settle for what I can get. If I can't snuggle and smell and sing to her every day, at least I can plan more visits (and soon!) watch her on the video cam and see photos taken just this afternoon of her silly face and curly clean hair and her amazingly funny feet.

But oh, still the ache.

Giggle of the Day

After blowing her very stuffy nose...

Sophie: How do you make a tissue dance?

Me: Um... play a it a jig?

Sophie: No! Put a little boogie in it!

This Is My Message To You-ou-ou

One might think, reading my blog over time, that I'm quite possibly mildly bi-polar. While that's one way to view it, I prefer my friend Bonnie's description - I have big feelings. Big lows (ah, Molly) and big highs. Today, we're on a definite upswing.

First off, Happy Happy Imbolc! My most favourite of the pagan holidays, and this one has dawned beautifully crisp and sunny. I had a fabulous swim - someone actually complimented me on my kickboarding, go figure. "Three Little Birds" is playing right now and the kids and I are dancing... how can that not lift one's spirits? And since Phil didn't see his shadow for the first time since 1999 spring is officially JUST around the corner.

Then there's the big news... JK Rowling has finished the last Harry Potter book - Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows - and announced that it will be released on July 21st! This kicks planning into high gear in our household, as we promised the kids that we'd go to London for its release. We're all so feckin' excited we hardly know what to do with ourselves. And somehow, by luck or kismet, the date doesn't conflict with any other summer plans. So two weeks in the UK this summer will be spent Harry Pottering, visiting friends, seeing castles... OH! THE EXCITEMENT! If you have any suggestions for things we must see and do with a 7 and 9 year old, please send them on.

WASL meets Pikachu, blood all over

In April, the boy will be taking the reading and math sections of the WASL (Washington Assessment of Student Learning) for the first time. Starting last week, as a way of helping the students know what kinds of questions to expect, his teacher started sending home practice questions as part of their weekly homework.

And now, apparently, I am having test anxiety on his behalf.

I find this strange because I was one of those freaky kids who enjoyed taking the state standardized tests. I've always tested well, and I loved the shuffling around of the routine during testing week. And as for the kid, he did fine on the practice sheet, and doesn't seem to be at all uptight about the test - what's to worry?

Tell that to my subconscious which treated me to a strange little dream in which Nathan, Sophie and I had to take the test, all together in the same room. But it wasn't your traditional reading and math test, oh no. The questions were these very complex story problems, and the very first one was not only testing math skills, but Pokemon knowledge (oh yes, boy is very much back into Pokemon these days and it's apparently bleeding into my life as well). There were 65 cards in the problem, and I had to figure out which one was the most powerful, based on hit points.

Of course, being in the same room as the kids was distracting me from the task at hand, so in addition to being flummoxed by the subject matter, I was also having a really hard time even understanding what I was being asked to do.

And the time limit was fast approaching...

Aaaagh!

Really. Aren't there other things my dreaming mind could better spend its time on?

Number One Sign That You Are A Mom

Discovering that not 10 minutes after dropping your kids off at school after two unexpected days at home plus a 2-hour delayed start to the school day... you miss them already.

Now This Is What I Call A Snow Day

The family that skis together...
Originally uploaded by spencerUW.

Last night, after we saw that Seattle schools would be closed again today, Stephen said to me "Let's go skiing tomorrow!" I looked at him as if he was crazy, considering the whole reason schools are closed is that roads were awful.

But here's the thing. The roads *were* awful, but only in some places. Our street was fine... as was the nearest arterial. Side streets off that arterial - sheer ice in spots and very steep so for all intents and purposes unpassable.

But lo and behold, DOT told us that the highways were clear. So this morning, our bunch suited up and headed for the mountains. Because when my husband, who is many things but decidedly NOT spontaneous, wants to play hooky and go skiing... who am I to say no?

The skiing was brilliant, possibly the best snow I've skiied on, powdery and dry. The only down side was that it was very cold; 11F/-21C when we left this afternoon to come home. That's too cold to fully enjoy the experience and having experienced it I promise not to complain about the usual mid-twenties we encounter up there ever again.

Call Me.. Impressed

I was going to report that Nathan is reading Moby Dick. But since he blew through it in 2 days, I have to alter the verb tense and report that he has read Moby Dick. It's the children's illustrated version, with no long dry descriptions of how whale blubber is processed, but still!

And for those parents who have any issues at all with their kids reading comics rather than "real" books, let me also report that Nathan's interest in the tale of the great white whale was formed while reading Bone, a comic series which has numerous references to the story. I think it's true that if you get 'em reading anything, as long as they enjoy it, you're on your way to having a reader.

Mondays Don't Always Suck

Case in point: today was a very good day and I am content.

My swim today was effortless (other than the getting out of bed part).

One chapter of my work life is nearly complete and another may very well be beginning soon (more on this as it unfolds).

Nathan's school conference was this afternoon and it went very well... I love his teacher and the way she interacts with him, I love that he takes a pride in the areas that he excels in, and I love that he's motivated to work on improving the areas that need improvement. It's all good with that boy, as challenging as he can be for me to parent sometimes.

Sophie has created and posted a list in the living room titled "My favrotie thigs". The list includes "hello kittie, pony's unacone's, faries, Strobarry Sortecake, Balto the Sled dog, mom and dad, brother, Sophie" and in the first column, each item has "love it" next to it. It makes me smile each time I see it.

I Love Being a Mom

Okay, yesterday was the Best. Mother's Day. Ever. The kidlets made me all kinds of sweet cards and pictures, stories and painted rock paper weights. We ate blueberry muffins, listened to the Tiger game (Tigers won! So did the Mariners!), ran a couple of errands and cleaned the garage while Stephen put some insulation in the attic to help keep the upstairs cooler. While manual labor might not sound like a great way to spend Mother's Day, it was exactly what I wanted to do... we've had so little time to spend on the house that all I asked for was a day of it with no complaints from kids that they were BORED.

Later in the day we did all go down to the park and Nathan got back on his bike a year after first removing the training wheels (with marginal success). After some initial stubbornness (on both mother and son's part), he started pedaling and didn't look back. The boy can now ride a bike and I am very proud.

We ended the day with salmon on the grill and a picnic in the backyard. Well, we actually ended the day with baths for two very grimy kids. Slept well, they did.

In keeping with the bike-riding theme, this poem came into my mailbox this morning. Made me predictably weepy.

Learning the Bicycle
by Wyatt Prunty

The older children pedal past
Stable as little gyros, spinning hard
To supper, bath, and bed, until at last
We also quit, silent and tired
Beside the darkening yard where trees
Now shadow up instead of down.
Their predictable lengths can only tease
Her as, head lowered, she walks her bike alone
Somewhere between her wanting to ride
And her certainty she will always fall.
Tomorrow, though I will run behind,
Arms out to catch her, she'll tilt then balance wide
Of my reach, till distance makes her small,
Smaller, beyond the place I stop and know
That to teach her I had to follow
And when she learned I had to let her go.

We Were Speaking of Belief...*

"Mom, is that Jesus?"

Sophie points to the large crucifix at the front of the church where we're sitting and waiting for the beginning of the choral program. We're here to listen to the Northwest Boychoir perform "A Festival of Lessons and Carols," a concert patterned after the Christmas Eve observance at King's College in Cambridge, England.

And as should be clear by Sophie's uncertainty about the iconography she sees prominently displayed, our focus is on the music, not the message. Although Stephen and I are both from Christian backgrounds, neither of has chosen to continue on that path; if one felt the need to label us, "agnostic leaning toward pagan” would come pretty close.

This being the case, our kids have had very little exposure to organized religion of any sort. For them, a church is a place you go to hear Nathan sing in a recital (as he had earlier in the day, with the early prep level of the choir), or a place that houses a daycare center. Pretty windows, high ceilings, good acoustics. They know that there are folk called “Christians” and others called “Jews” and “Muslims” and “Pagans” but thus far they have only the vaguest notion of what it means to be a member of those communities.

Sophie's question is simple enough, so I follow suit with the simple answer. "Yes, it is."

Then Nathan chimes in. "Uhhh... why is he on that wood thing?"

Thanks boyo. So much for simple.

So it begins in earnest, the complicated process of discussing religion, faith, and ritual with the kids. I've both anticipated and dreaded its approach; this is where having a strong belief system to start from would be helpful, I think, in framing the conversation. But, instead, like any good secular liberal, I made my way that night after the concert to Amazon and ordered a few books that I think will be helpful in getting us started.

I want the kids to have a good understanding of what different people believe, and how those beliefs affect others around them, politically and socially. I want to give them the vocabulary and the histories, make sure they understand the major players and the major events, the differences and similarities. And if they find a belief system that resonates with them, that they want to explore in a more emotional/spiritual way, we’ll follow that path where it leads.

Even (or maybe especially) if it leads here.

*Major props to anyone who knows the title's obscure reference without googling!

Cultchah

After the Nutcracker
Originally uploaded by monagrrl.

Oh yeah, baby. We got it, in spades.

Last weekend, our family attended not one, but TWO theatah events. On Saturday, we took in the Seattle Children's Theatre production of "Sleeping Beauty." It was wonderfully done - the sets, the singing, the acting... just fantastic (as girlie is fond of saying).

Then, On Sunday, we saw the Nutcracker together for the first time. Not knowing whether the kids (read: the son) would enjoy the ballet, we went the less expensive route and attended a (very good!) performance by the Olympic Ballet Theatre rather than the fancier and spendier Pacific Northwest Ballet.

We needn't have worried. Though boyo did admit that some parts were boring, he liked it on the whole and wants to go again next year. Ms. Thang was completely and utterly enthralled. She sat almost completely still through the performance, eyes riveted to the stage, and then clapped wildly when the times for clapping came.

It's interesting to think how different their childhood experiences have been (and will continue to be) than mine were. Each year they see several plays, attend concerts and baseball games, visit museums and the zoo and the aquarium. All of these things are easily accessible, one of the benefits of living in a city of Seattle's size.

Contrast this with my childhood growing up in a small town. I remember how exciting it was when we went on class field trips to one of the bigger cities nearby (Battle Creek, Lansing, or Kalamazoo) to see the occasional performance (the only one I remember specifically was El Sombrero De Tres Picos, "The Three-Cornered Hat" - bless Mrs. Malovey, my Spanish teacher) or visit museums or the zoo.

My grandparents did take me to concerts (old-time country music, natch), and we did have a movie theater (The Main - one screen, and you get what you get) but that was really the extent of my cultural access. Mine was not a theatre-going family, despite the fact that my hometown boasts one of the oldest in Michigan.

(Which brings up a minor digression. Tibbets Opera House is a beautiful theatre that was built in 1882. Thanks to its summer theatre program it was named by USA Today "one of the ten great places to see the lights way off Broadway." How cool is that? Not that I ever saw any professional productions there, but still.)

Sometimes I wonder... will my kids, by virtue of the abundance of opportunities they have, miss out on experiencing these things as special? Will they take it all for granted and eventually find it boring? Maybe, though I really hope not (and I'll do my job and remind them, frequently and with much vigor, how lucky they are).

Instead, my wish for them is that it will open up artistic worlds and possibilites that they can choose to know and dwell in where I was only an occasional visitor.

Words That Bring the Tears

We had a lovely family evening; Thursdays are the nights we normally eat out, and our restaurant of choice is frequently Rositas, a yummy and uber-family friendly Mexican restaurant where we're on a first-name basis with a number of the staff. Sophie was full of chat and questions, Nathan and Stephen played table football, and I downed my margarita in no time flat. What's not to love?

Bedtime though, did have its drama, but not due to any family strife. No, Jack, Laura's beloved dog (On The Shores of Silver Lake) died, and Sophie wept the loud and bitter tears. I will say that the girl comes by it honestly; my tears were silent, but still they were there.

After I got her to calm down a little, I explained that she and I have what my friend Bonnie once referred to as "big feelings" and that she could probably look forward to a life time of crying at books, movies, dolphin shows, musical performances, parades, and particularly poignant Hallmark commercials (I do! I care enough to send the very best!).

But one thing I'm sure of: there is no WAY we're going to be reading Where the Red Fern Grows anytime soon.

P.S. Happy Birthday, Howard Dean! (grumble, unelectabe my *ass*, woulda shoulda coulda...)

Milestones

It's hard to believe but it's true - our children are - right now - upstairs going to sleep in their very own beds in their very own rooms. The work isn't completely done as there are still dozens of little finishing touches I'll be making for months probably, but the kids are happy with it and most of their stuff migrated up today.

Nathan has been ready since the end of the summer when he spent 3 weeks sleeping up there in what was then the guest room (moving down only when we started painting). We weren't so sure about Sophie; if you asked, she said she was ready, but between being on a different floor from us and never having had her own space since... well... birth, we weren't completely sure.

No worries. She was thrilled to get into bed, turned her lights low until they looked like stars (they're halogen spotlights on a dimmer so she can bring them down to a glow), kissed us goodnight and that was that.

Tomorrow we go look for desks, under-bed storage containers, and a table with comfy chairs for their hallway sitting area. And then I take pictures. Patience.

This 'n That

Well damned if the kind weather gods didn't listen and give us a lovely day of sun and blue sky and light breezes to dry up some of the wet. Still cold, but cold without rain is completely tolerable. I wish I had the same kind of pull with the benevolent lotto gods. (And just in case I do, pleasepleaseplease nice deities of the big money, I will certainly play this Wednesday.)

Ah, coincidence. It's a funny thing. I finished the novel Broken For You last night and was talking to a friend about how much I had liked it, at the same time noting that you have to accept that the resolution involves some mighty big coincidences. Then, before falling asleep I read through the book's acknowledgements and got hit between the eyes with my very own coincidence when I came across the name of a good friend of mine among the thanked. Stranger even was that I had seen this friend earlier in the evening and almost brought up that I was reading a book I was sure she would love. I'm glad I didn't though - it was more fun this way.

I'm feeling very content tonight. It was just an incredibly pleasant Sunday, and I accomplished much: watching Nathan's soccer game, painting, grocery shopping, putting together a photo album for Sophie's soccer coach, raking, visiting with friends, cleaning fish tanks, and more painting. My sweetie is home from his trip, kids are sleeping, and life is good.

Requisite Halloween Cuteness

Darth and the Littlest Ghost
Originally uploaded by monagrrl.

Another night of sugar and revelry has come and gone with much success and more candy than any pair of children needs. We got a wee bit damp but stayed reasonably warm and had a great time tromping up and down the hills in our neighbourhood with a pack of good friends.

It took Nathan only 1/2 hour to ditch the helmet (the eyes kept fogging up) and the gloves (he couldn't grab the candy very well). At which point he declared himself the Boy in Black. Uh-huh. Sophie's costume, on the other hand, held up very well and got lots of comments as to its originality which boggled my mind. Nobody wants to be a sheet-bedecked ghost anymore, apparently. Go figure.

Though undocumented photographically, I'll report that I was dressed as a bird flu victim - grey-faced with dark circles painted around my eyes. If only I had had a rubber chicken to carry around, it would have been the most awesome costume ever.

A World of Pure Imagination

After finishing up our reading of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory last week, and with their expressed desire to see the Johnny Depp version of the movie sometime soon, I thought it important that the kids see the Gene Wilder version first. So tonight we watched, and I was transported back to my own childhood with them. It had been... damn, I don't know HOW long since I had seen it last.

What a great movie... although the opening chocolate montage nearly did me in. My mouth was literally watering, and it took all the willpower I possess not to break into the chocolate chips that - even now, hours later - call to me from the kitchen with their wicked siren song.

And how I love Gene Wilder. Adore. The. Man. The only other actor that compares to him on my pure love meter is Dick Van Dyke. I tell you - when those two pass on, I might not be able to get out of bed for a few weeks.

But I digress.

What I loved most about tonight was that my kids wanted to watch the whole movie again, immediately. When that wasn't possible (it was already nearly 9 o'clock and a chapter of Charlie and the Great Glass Elevator awaited), what scene did they choose to see, when the option was offerred up? Yup. The scary boat speeding through the tunnel with disturbing images scene.

How cool is that? I have freaky freaky kids.

Nathan on Nathan

With permission, here is what Nathan wrote to introduce himself to his Day Camp leaders this summer. It was a form letter with blanks to fill in; the italicized portions are his.

A Letter To My Group Leader

Date June 8, 2005

Dear Group Leader,

My name is Nathan. My friends call me Nate and Nathan. I will be in 2nd grade at school in the fall. I have 0 brothers, ages __, and 1 sisters, ages 5. When I am not in school, I like to play baseball, sketch Nature, sketch Spiderman, read and play Gameboy. But I don't like to sit around doing nothing. I am good at math, baseball and reading. I am coming to YMCA Day Camp Sand Point because I want to learn more about camping. At Day Camp Sand Point I want to have fun, make new friends, and help each other, but I don't think I would like to sit around doing nothing. I get along with friends that are happy, listin, help each other, and are in a good mood. Last summer I went camping, went to a rodeo, went river rafting, and a folk festival.

Other things you should know about me are I am 7 years old, I live on ** Ave, I am kind, I am honest, I like to sing, and I have 2 cats and 3 fish.

Camper's Signature: Nathan

Happy Birthday, Boy!

But don't underestimate me...
I'm seven years tall
and all I need is a cape and a mask
so I can fly outta here
I can fly
- Eddie From Ohio

Seven (!) years ago today my life changed forever. I still remember the first morning I woke up in my own bed, my now empty tummy lying like an entity unto itself next to me. At first it felt like it might be any other morning, but then I heard the fruit of my loins stirring in his bassinet at the end of the bed. And I thought...

"What have I done, and is there any way I can get out of it?!?"

Not my proudest moment, that.

Luckily, it got better. My "NOT A NORMAL BABY!" has grown into a sweet, beautiful and smart little boy who wants to grow up to be a professional baseball player or a singer - at least today.

So much more to write, but I feel incapable of making much sense - too sleepy. Nathan had 4 boys over for a birthday slumber party last night... as would be expected, there wasn't much slumbering. They went to bed around 10:30 and were up and at 'em by 5:30. We survived 'em. Barely.

Robert, We Hardly Knew Ye

Today we bid a sad farewell to Robert, Nathan's betta fish and first proprietary pet. Although Robert was a member of our family for only six short weeks, we had become accustomed to his cheerful presence, and he will be sorely missed.

Named in honour of Nathan's baseball coach, Robert was light-blue and full of fishy vigor. During his short life, he enjoyed swimming, hiding in his fake-plant forest, and building bubble nests.

Goodbyes were said at a simple service in our backyard where we buried him (with some food and a hollow bone in which he might hide in his piscine afterlife) under the dogwood tree; his final resting place is marked by a lovely stone that Nathan picked out.

While many bitter tears were shed, we all agreed that we were happy that Robert spent his final days being cared for and loved by Nathan... for what better fate could any fish wish?

In addition to his human family, Robert is survived by his roommate (though not his tankmate!) Lucille, Sophie's bright-blue transsexual betta. She asks that in lieu of cards or flowers, donations be made in Robert's name to "Nathan and Sophie's Disneyland Fund."

Requiescat in pace, petit piscis.

Tale of the Tooth

Nathan lost his first tooth on Sunday and I am now an unwilling captive of his gap-toothed smile and oh-so-slight sibilance. I'm not sure what it is, but I'm unable to stay mad or say no when he flashes the grin my way. The worst part is that he knows it - senses my weakness like blood in the water - and uses his advantage mercilessly.

Both of his bottom teeth have been loose for awhile, but not the hanging-by-a thread, twisty-in-the-socket kind of loose. Just wiggly with no indication that it would be any less than a few weeks or a few months even before the tooth fairy would come a-knockin.

So what changed? Well, in one of those increasingly common moments where the boy ignored my "do-as-I-say-not-as-I-do" mantra, he decided to try to remove a paper wristband with his teeth. (Strangely enough, I was doing the same thing with his sister's wristband in a different room at the time.) One of the loose teeth decided it wasn't up for the fight and out it popped. A bit of blood but no pain - and one VERY excited and frustratingly cute boy smiling at me as I emerged from the bathroom with a paper towel to staunch the flow.

The tooth fairy obligingly took the itty bitty thing and left a shiny Sacajawea dollar in the pocket of his tooth prince pillow. She was kind enough to leave the tooth for me as a memento of the occasion.

Now Nathan is ready to be free of #2 and begged me to tie a string to the other loose one to yank it out. I assured him that it's too soon... the string trick only works when the tooth is ready.

"Okay, mom. That's what my friends at YMCA said too."

Ah, I see. I'm the second opinion now. I nod and smile, and watch the milestones pass so quickly that I don't dare blink.