Life is What Happens When You're Busy Making Other Plans

It has been a day of punches, and of me doing my best to roll with them. I mostly succeeded.

It took Brother Bear 2 to completely undo me.

Rewind to this morning, when I was on the receiving end of one of those talks. You know, the ones that start with your manager saying "There's no easy way to say this..." and ends with you beginning to disentangle yourself physically and emotionally from an office that you thought might be one in which you could happily stay for awhile. Into the bag go the lego Harry, Ron, Hermione and Snape, followed by the stuffed peep and Dory ("just keep swimming" indeed!), Kim Possible, and Elastigirl. The family photos and kid artwork will stay up 'til next week, just so it's not COMPLETELY depressing to go in a few more times as I try to be productive and leave some useful words behind.

But, even as a few minor waves of panic rolled through at the thought of having to continue the scratch and troll of the freelance life I thought I was leaving behind, behind it was some calm and relief. This one wasn't the right fit. The people were good people, but not necessarily my people, the work was not what had I thought it would be. It wasn't done with malice, but even so the result is the same: back to the search.

Still (roll), by the time I arrived home, I had reached some equilibrium and felt emotionally lighter... like summer vacation was truly just around the corner. We had promised the kids we'd go see Ratatouille so after dinner off we went, driving across town to the Majestic Bay Theatre... a bit farther than necessary, but worth it (says my movie theater snob husband) for the better experience.

Accelerating from the stop sign we heard and felt the "clunk" and experienced the inability to shift into ANY gear. Traffic was light, we were lucky and got it pulled over and parked on the side of the road without incident... but there was no driving it. It sits, even now, with a note on the dashboard and will sit there until after the holiday passes before we can discover how deeply we'll need to dig to pay for what can't be anything but costly repairs.

And still again (roll)... it was a beautiful evening, sunny and breezy. Despite the disappointment, we all took in stride and enjoyed the walk through a nice neighbourhood to the bus stop. The busses arived in good time and we came home to watch the Netflixed selection that just arrived today: Brother Bear 2.

Before we settled in, I did a final check on baseball scores. The Mariners had managed to have one of their worst games of the season, losing 17-3 to Kansas City (of all teams!). And my Tigers... a 5-4 extra innings loss to Cleveland. It's a game - I know - but it means a lot to me, and I can't help but add these outcomes to the tally of crap. I voted a few more times to help get Jeremy Bonderman on the All-Star team and triend to remember that the season is a marathon, not a sprint (roll).

We started the movie. I was weepy within the first 10 minutes. This isn't actually anything unexpected; it's a rare movie I watch that doesn't, at some point, evoke a welling up of emotion, accompanied by good-natured teasing by my other family members. But by the movie's end, even I had to acknowledge that there was more going on than a reaction to McGrizzly (aka Kenai, voiced this time around by Patrick Dempsey) almost dying but then being reunited with the girl he'd loved since childhood when she decides to become a bear too.

Letting out the frustrations and fears of the day? You bet. Some catharsis? Most definitely. Not Where The Red Fern Grows-level complete-body sobbing catharsis, but enough for now.

And speaking of now it's time for a good night's slep so I can recharge and get ready for whatever tomorrow brings. It's bound to be better, right? I'm hoping that it will necessitate a LOT less rolling.