Lively Writhing

So...

2009-11-01T19:17:00.001-08:00

When do pitchers and catchers report?

Shaking off the dust

2009-10-25T09:33:00.001-07:00

So... the boy has shamed me into coming back here to do some writing, as he's been working on his own blog a little. How could I say no to such a request from my number-one fan? Problem is, I'm really not sure how much public navelgazing I'm in the mood for these days. Obviously, I haven't been in almost a year now.

The writing muscles have gone slack, and I've definitely turned inwards. Writing for an audience, even if it's a small and largely happenstance one, takes some effort if there's any hope of not being a complete bore. Gotta use metphors 'n shit. I'm not sure if I have so many metaphors in me these days.

But I'll give it a go. November is coming up, and though I failed miserably at daily posts last year... well, I'm always ready to try failing miserably at stuff again.

President Obama

2008-11-04T23:14:00.000-08:00

Holy freakin' heck.

I'm not sure what more there is to say. Congratulations President Obama and Vice-president Biden.

Finally. Finally, it's OVER. And finally it's begun.

Space cadet

2008-11-03T22:50:00.000-08:00

I'm not sure if it's the time change or the election or just life in general, but today was a VERY strange day. I kept losing focus, catching myself literally staring off into space. People would talk to me, and I'd have to make a real, concerted effort to tune into what they were saying. For someone who prides herself on good communication and listening skills, it was just... weird.

The Time Between the Lightning and the Thunder

2008-11-02T15:35:00.001-08:00

Cruising around my usual online haunts, I see the near-total obsession everyone has with the election... Facebook and IM statii make mention, conversations that normally don't pertain to politics in any way (baseball, parenting, finances) have gone off-topic to all-election all the time.

In just over 48 hours we're going to have a pretty good idea if this all works out or once again goes to shit in the final moments. We're heading into the time between the lightning and the thunder.

I love that image, as it comes from an (I think still) unreleased song by David Wilcox. The song tells a sad story, that captures perfectly that moment after something major shifts - something that can never go back to what it was before - and the time it takes for it to sink in and become part of a new reality. Hoo boy.

The time between the lightning and the thunder,
The time to wait before her fate arrives.
She looks out at the sky and starts to wonder
If a miracle might let it pass her by.

The time it takes the pain of it to reach her,
The moment that her world is blown apart.
The wisdom in the silence there to teach her,
His time had been this precious from the start.

The bullet changes everything and nothing.
Gunshots will echo down the block.
This life, this could have been something...
The door that he was running for was locked.

Chorus:
She's in the time between the lightning and the thunder,
Before the shock can hit that this is real.
The disbelieving spell she's falling under,
And the time it takes before her heart can feel.

She says:
Oh my love...
It's all right...
I'm right here...
You're just asleep now.
Oh my love...
Here's my coat...
You're so cold...
Beside the street now.

The time it takes to die in some old western
Is time enough to tell where gold is hid.
Time enough to answer one last question,
Pass the map and compass to the kid.

But this time there is nothing like that virtue.
Just stillness in the heart that used to beat.
The darkness that she is falling into
Is spreading on the pavement at her feet.

Chorus:
She's in the time between the lightning and the thunder,
Before the shock can hit that this is real.
The disbelieving spell she's falling under,
And the time it takes before her heart can feel.

She says:
Oh my love...
Here's my coat...
You're so cold...
Beside the street here.
Oh my love...
It's all right...
I'm right here...
You're just asleep here.

The time between the lightning and the thunder.
The time between the lightning and the thunder.

Here we go again

2008-11-01T11:04:00.000-07:00

It's November 1, and because I'm too freakin' lazy to try to write a novel this month with the real writers, I'm vampiring off their group mojo to kick my bloggin' ass back into gear. KBloWriMo 3 begins!

For all 3 of you paying attention, yes it should be KBloWriMo4, if you consider that KBlowWiMo1 was back in 1995 (ouch, that was a lot of numbers - I hope I didn't lose anybody). But truth is that I forgot last year until a few days into the month and - completist that I am - I figured it was best to skip entirely. The missed days would always eat at me, I know they would. I obsess like that.

Happily, this year I'm presented with tons of potential November content to write about so it shouldn't be too painful (for any of us). Most obviously, Tuesday is the election. I'm... hopeful, though that hope is understandably mixed with a large dollop of terrified. I don't think I'm alone in this mix of feelings. We've been hopeful before and it didn't work out that well - I'm not sure I can survive another day after like last time .

But there's also plenty going on at work, stuff with friends, family, kids... there's tons navelgazing gold to mine, no doubt. Aren't we all so very lucky?

Tri tri again...

2008-08-18T18:12:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was the Seattle 2008 Danskin triathlon. I look back in my archives and can't actually believe that I didn't blog about the 2007 Danskin... the gateway drug to what has become something that I... well.. DO. It wouldn't have seemed that way at the time... in 2007, the day dawned rainy and low 60's. I panicked on the swim (my best event) and took far longer than I should have. The bike course was wet and scary and I went very slowly. The run was my only triumph, and only a triumph because my goal had been to run the entire thing and I actually did, though slowly (running is not something I'm either very good at or enjoy). My triathlete friends and I ended the day very cold and very very wet and wishing that we could have enjoyed our moment in the sun, savouring our accomplishment; instead I came home, bathed until I finally warmed up, and slept.

But even given the disappointment of the weather, I was hooked... my friends Shar, Lillian and I signed up that very week for our next triathlon in September. And we've done 2 more since, plus various 5's, 10's, and even a 12K.

This year, the Danskin was actually my 2nd event of the tri season, the first was the Federal Escape a few weeks ago. The Danskin though, is in a class all by itself with 4000ish women gathering together, at hugely varying levels of fitness and ability, being all sporty and supportive of one another.

The weather ended up being perfect this year; somewhat overcast early on, sun breaking through right towards the end of my run, so it was cool but pleasant. And I have to say - I rocked it. My swim was wonderful, my biking was wonderful (even though my chain came off and a very nice fellow triathlete stopped to help me get it back on), my run was... well. It was slightly better than last year. So let's just call it wonderful as well.

I reached my goal - I did better in all the events (even the run!) than I did last year. My overall time was 13 minutes faster; 12 of that came on the bike, BUT, I swam in about the same time as I did last year... and the course was 200 meters longer. I felt great after it was over, and my friends and I got our moment in the sun. It was a most excellent experience.

Two more tris to go this season; Black Diamond and Kirkland.

Dudes. I'm a triathlete! :)

The Summer Day

2008-06-30T19:26:00.000-07:00

Perfectly true, on this summer day.

The Summer Day
by Mary Oliver

Who made the world?
Who made the swan, and the black bear?
Who made the grasshopper?
This grasshopper, I mean—
the one who has flung herself out of the grass,
the one who is eating sugar out of my hand,
who is moving her jaws back and forth instead of up and down—
who is gazing around with her enormous and complicated eyes.
Now she lifts her pale forearms and thoroughly washes her face.
Now she snaps her wings open, and floats away.
I don't know exactly what a prayer is.
I do know how to pay attention, how to fall down
into the grass, how to kneel down in the grass,
how to be idle and blessed, how to stroll through the fields,
which is what I have been doing all day.
Tell me, what else should I have done?
Doesn't everything die at last, and too soon?
Tell me, what is it you plan to do
with your one wild and precious life?

"The Summer Day" by Mary Oliver, from The Truro Bear and Other Adventures: Poems and Essays. © Beacon Press, 2008.

...

2008-06-29T11:28:00.001-07:00

I notice, looking over last several posts, that I'm a fan of the ellipse.

Not Complaining... Much

2008-06-29T09:46:00.001-07:00

The weather, which had brought us the coldest spring in many years (colder than Siberia, we were told), has turned. Yesterday it got into the high 80's, today we'll hit 90.

I shouldn't complain. Summer, right? It's supposed to be warm.

Unfortunately, I am a wilting flower who only blooms in the 70's.

The GOOD thing about the heat, is that it will start getting the lake heated to a tolerable temperature. This afternoon the plan is to take my first swim in preparation for the July 26th tri I've committed to. I will be wetsuited, but 64 degrees is still pretty cold.

Surfacing... again.

2008-06-26T19:41:00.001-07:00

I'm here! I'm alive! Where the hell did 4 months go?

This is where I've been for the last few months. I PM'ed a major redesign of the site and worked harder than I have in my ENTIRE life. Harder, actually, than I want to work EVER again. But it's done, and I have my evenings and weekends back again. And it's good.

And yes, the irony of working for that particular client is not lost on me. If any of my co-workers (whom I love dearly) find their way here and discover my secret, I can only hope that my dedication prompts them to forgive my inability to forego that which I dearly love. The heart wants what it wants.

Be Very Afraid...

2008-03-02T11:16:00.000-08:00

That's what we're hearing from the Hillary camp. As this terrific video points out - we've heard it all before...

(snagged from Betsey at My Whim Is Law.

Oh what a world it seems we live in...

2008-01-28T22:51:00.000-08:00

I was ~~wasting some time~~ walking down memory lane tonight, listening to old tv themes one of which was from ABC's Wide World of Sports. Anyone my age remembers the opening montage... "The thrill of victory, and the agony of defeat." And we remember the image that played along with the agony, a spectacular ski jumping crash, the guy spinning wildly out of control. It's etched, forever, in the mind's eye.

So I wondered - whatever happened to the agony of defeat guy? Was he seriously injured? Did he go on to jump again? Is he still alive? Now - and this is where the amazing part comes in - it took me less than 10 seconds to find the answers to ALL of those questions, thanks to google and wikipedia. It's a great story - go read it.

But then it struck me how absolutely amazing of a time we live in. When I was a kid, if that question had popped into my head, the answer would have been... "Yeah, hm. I wonder." Short of going to the library and checking the microfiche (do they still have that now?), there would have been no way to find the answer. My kids will never know a time when such a wealth of information is more than a few keystrokes away.

Absolutely amazing.

In Loving Memory

2007-11-05T21:46:00.000-08:00

Our sweet girl Aggie died today; I was with her when she breathed her last. She went at home, quietly, and I petted her gently the whole time. Her absence leaves a far larger hole than you might believe, considering she was a cat who really didn't cotton much to being touched, or given much attention at all - she spent a lot of time in the basement (hence her nickname "skulky"), or sleeping on our bed. But she was our family, and we loved her, and we miss her. Goodnight little Agammemnon, rest well.

And Much Fun Was Had...

2007-11-04T21:55:00.001-08:00

pineapple classic - before the start
Originally uploaded by spencerUW

Well, it didn't rain, we didn't drop our pineapple, and we had a freakin' blast. Our team finished 123rd out of 251 4-person teams overall, and 25th out of 76 female 4-person teams. We all finished at just a sconce over 35minutes. and our combined finish time was 2:20:28.

We wore cute t-shirts decorated by kids in the Comet room (with sewn on comet trails of red and gold) and started the race with silly plastic caps (which sadly came off once the sweat started).

The obstacles were fun - tires to run through, a balance beam, a couple of walls to climb over and nets to climb under. My personal favorite was throwing the pineapple through a tire on top of a wall. I got it through on the first toss, and my teammate Elizabeth caught it expertly.

Thanks tons to everyone who donated (and it's not too late, in case you meant to but didn't get around to it... I can collect 'em through the end of November).

A Pineapple a Day...

2007-10-23T13:56:00.000-07:00

So, this whole triathlon thing has led to me becoming slightly insane. It apparently wasn't enough to just do the thing and get it over with and return to my previous inactive life... no, for some strange reason, I've continued to train, and have this idea that I want to sign up for a 5K every month between now and next tri season to keep me moderately motivated to continue running through the winter.

Much thanks for this goes to my friend Shar who shows up at o'dark thirty a couple of mornings each week (if it isn't raining) to take me running at Green Lake, and who - when I say "are you SURE we should sign up?" peer pressures me past my resistance.

Which leads me to the reason for this post. On November 3rd, I am going to participate in a 5K race, along with 3 friends, on a team we're calling "Faster than a speeding Comet roomer" (all of our kids went to the same preschool where the 4-5 year-old room is called the Comet room). It's not your ordinary 5K... there are obstacles that have to be overcome, and we have to do it while carrying - I kid you not - a pineapple. It's called the Pineapple Classic, it's a fund-raiser for the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society, and I am collecting donations on my very own donations page.

Come on - if the thought of me running (probably in the rain), climbing over things, and lugging a pineapple around doesn't motivate you to give some money, I'm not sure what would. I will even post a photo after the event, possibly even of me.

Food For Thought

2007-09-14T07:10:00.000-07:00

Rumi - Guest House

This being human is a guest house
Every morning a new arrival.
A joy, a depression, a meanness,
some momentary awareness comes
as an unexpected visitor.
Welcome and entertain them all!
Even if they are a crowd of sorrows,
who violently sweep your house
empty of its furniture,
still treat each guest honorably.
He may be clearing you out for some new delight.
The dark thought, the shame, the malice,
meet them at the door laughing,
and invite them in.
Be grateful for whoever comes,
because each has been sent
as a guide from beyond.

I'm Not Dead Yet!

2007-09-13T16:20:00.000-07:00

Though sadly, this place has been for far too long. That's going to change, and soon... there's just too much that's happened in the last couple of months that I need to document, and more stuff coming down the line. And when you're talking to your mom on the phone and says "so are you ever going to write anything in your blog again?" I think it's a sure sign either of the apocalypse or that it is indeed time to update.

For today, a triumph. In my morning yoga class (a week-long intensive), I started out in prasarita padottanasana (note: the images are NOT me, but use your imagination, 'mkay?):

and using only my stomach muscles, floated my legs out sideways and up into a headstand:

FWOOP. Just like that. Okay, it was slower than "fwoop" seems to indicate, but still. I was so excited I almost fell over, but managed to keep my balance for 20 seconds or so before coming back down in a vaguely graceful manner.

So miracles do happen. Like effortless headstands. And me writing here again.

Updates

2007-07-10T14:55:00.000-07:00

Car: Drive shaft failure. Covered by a the sweet 10/100000 VW Powertrain Warranty. Thank GOODNESS.

Movie: Ratatouille was AWESOME. Tomorrow we have tickets in hand for Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince.

Work: Last day today. A few possibilities on the horizon. Looking forward to a laid-back August.

Mercury Retrograde: O-ver.

Weather: Predicted to be FECKIN HOT. In the 90's! Hello.... Seattle?

Life is What Happens When You're Busy Making Other Plans

2007-07-03T20:20:00.000-07:00

It has been a day of punches, and of me doing my best to roll with them. I mostly succeeded.

It took Brother Bear 2 to completely undo me.

Rewind to this morning, when I was on the receiving end of one of those talks. You know, the ones that start with your manager saying "There's no easy way to say this..." and ends with you beginning to disentangle yourself physically and emotionally from an office that you thought might be one in which you could happily stay for awhile. Into the bag go the lego Harry, Ron, Hermione and Snape, followed by the stuffed peep and Dory ("just keep swimming" indeed!), Kim Possible, and Elastigirl. The family photos and kid artwork will stay up 'til next week, just so it's not COMPLETELY depressing to go in a few more times as I try to be productive and leave some useful words behind.

But, even as a few minor waves of panic rolled through at the thought of having to continue the scratch and troll of the freelance life I thought I was leaving behind, behind it was some calm and relief. This one wasn't the right fit. The people were good people, but not necessarily my people, the work was not what had I thought it would be. It wasn't done with malice, but even so the result is the same: back to the search.

Still (roll), by the time I arrived home, I had reached some equilibrium and felt emotionally lighter... like summer vacation was truly just around the corner. We had promised the kids we'd go see Ratatouille so after dinner off we went, driving across town to the Majestic Bay Theatre... a bit farther than necessary, but worth it (says my movie theater snob husband) for the better experience.

Accelerating from the stop sign we heard and felt the "clunk" and experienced the inability to shift into ANY gear. Traffic was light, we were lucky and got it pulled over and parked on the side of the road without incident... but there was no driving it. It sits, even now, with a note on the dashboard and will sit there until after the holiday passes before we can discover how deeply we'll need to dig to pay for what can't be anything but costly repairs.

And still again (roll)... it was a beautiful evening, sunny and breezy. Despite the disappointment, we all took in stride and enjoyed the walk through a nice neighbourhood to the bus stop. The busses arived in good time and we came home to watch the Netflixed selection that just arrived today: Brother Bear 2.

Before we settled in, I did a final check on baseball scores. The Mariners had managed to have one of their worst games of the season, losing 17-3 to Kansas City (of all teams!). And my Tigers... a 5-4 extra innings loss to Cleveland. It's a game - I know - but it means a lot to me, and I can't help but add these outcomes to the tally of crap. I voted a few more times to help get Jeremy Bonderman on the All-Star team and triend to remember that the season is a marathon, not a sprint (roll).

We started the movie. I was weepy within the first 10 minutes. This isn't actually anything unexpected; it's a rare movie I watch that doesn't, at some point, evoke a welling up of emotion, accompanied by good-natured teasing by my other family members. But by the movie's end, even I had to acknowledge that there was more going on than a reaction to McGrizzly (aka Kenai, voiced this time around by Patrick Dempsey) almost dying but then being reunited with the girl he'd loved since childhood when she decides to become a bear too.

Letting out the frustrations and fears of the day? You bet. Some catharsis? Most definitely. Not Where The Red Fern Grows-level complete-body sobbing catharsis, but enough for now.

And speaking of now it's time for a good night's slep so I can recharge and get ready for whatever tomorrow brings. It's bound to be better, right? I'm hoping that it will necessitate a LOT less rolling.

Morning Giggle

2007-06-18T23:33:00.000-07:00

IM ON YUR BLOG
FREEKIN OUT YUR READRS

***

This is what I get for leaving my blog post window open and going to bed before my silly spouse... a reference, of course, to this (for you Sopranos fans):

Rites of Passage

2007-06-15T08:46:00.000-07:00

This is something that my boy may be embarrassed about me sharing publicly sometime in the future, but hey - I figure I'm setting him up for therapy in myriad ways, so this will be just a drop in the bucket.

After a great baseball season, he's now playing for a few more weeks on the all-star team. As the tournaments they're competing in play with hard balls rather than the softcore ones he's used up until now, the coaches recommend that the boys wear "protection" in their nether regions to deflect balls that might take unfortunate bounces.

So yesterday, Stephen took boy to the sporting goods store and got him his first ever cup, or as Nathan calls it "the weenie shield." Good times!

I Am Lame

2007-06-12T23:23:00.000-07:00

Why? Because life ain't so very bad and here I am not writing about it! In fact, life is really pretty good today, as Justin Verlander threw a no-no (the 1st Tiger no-hitter since Jack Morris in 1984). It was a thing of beauty; Sophie and I were home watching the last two innings and I got all verklempt and shaky after the final out was recorded.

Other things are good too, like sleep. It's late and I'm tired. But I'll be back.

Today...

2007-05-09T19:16:00.000-07:00

... has been a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.

Now, off to yoga to hopefully breathe and let some of it go.

(Hi.)

Opening Day

2007-04-02T09:47:00.000-07:00

For, lo, the winter is past,
The rain is over and gone;
The flowers appear on the earth;
The time of the singing of birds is come,
And the voice of the turtle is heard in our land.

Ah, I love this day. So much hope, all possibilities open. I'm listening to the Tigers pre-game show right now and am trying not to bounce out of my seat with the excitement of it all. Okay, so part of that might be the caffeine high, as I've only had coffee and dark yummy chocolate this morning thus far. I feel a little like Persephone, coming up from the underworld after a long 6 months and finally getting to see the sun and eat something other than pomegranate seeds.

This afternoon, we'll get the kids out of school early and make our way to Safeco to see the Mariners play, and hopefully put the Oakland curse of last year behind them.

Play ball, y'all!

A Quick But Very Important Note

2007-03-20T17:27:00.000-07:00

Dearest K -

I have some good news and some bad news.

First, as is the convention, the good news: you're not going to be doing the breast stroke anymore at the pool. I know how you dislike it... it feels slow and awkward, and the amount of snot you end up blowing out of your nose is unattractive to say the least. I know you felt that you needed to practice it, since you've heard from others that when you do the swimming leg of the Danskin tri it's difficult to do the crawl in the initial crowded field. Adding in one length per each four you swam was a good plan, it really was. You made a good effort. But that's done now.

Because... well, now it's time for the bad news: you hurt me. Shhh Shhh... it's okay. I know you didn't mean to - it's just that the breast stroke kick torques me in a way that causes me pain... I'm still aching, many hours later. In just two sessions, you've done what we managed to avoid the last two ski seasons. No, no - thankfully not as badly as before. But enough so that I have to put our mutual foot down and insist that you go back to the good ole flutter kick.

Thanks so much for the attention, and keep up the good work!

With Love and Flexibility,
Your Right Knee

I Hate Hillary (in case you were wondering)

2007-03-14T22:45:00.000-07:00

I know, I know. You've been dying to know who I'm throwing my considerable political clout (*coff*) behind in race for Democratic Presidential nominee. I have indeed been thinking about it quite a lot lately, and here's what I've come up with so far.

The old-timers here know that the genesis of this blog coincided with the full bloom of my love affair with Howard Dean. And as much as I still love him in ways both holy and un-, and still think he would make an amazing President, I want him to stay exactly where he is right now - kicking butt and taking names in the Democratic party, leading us to victories in all 50 states, helping us take back Congress... oh, wait, he's already done that part. SUCK ON THAT, Terry McAuliffe.

So then my next choice is Al Gore, the last man actually elected President. Sadly, he continues to thwart me by not actually... oh, you know... running. Selfish bastard. I guess he'll continue to do good educating people about the whole global warming thing. Go Al!

Bill... well, he can't. Stupid 22nd Amendment.

When it comes down to the candidates who are actually running, I can't say that anyone makes my socks roll up and down the way Dean did. But I can tell you one person who I do NOT want to get the nomination. Hillary Freakin' Clinton. In my opinion, she is this election cycle's John Kerry (oh gods, please don't let that be an accurate prediction).

At first I didn't like her because of her vote to authorize this horrible, horrible war - and that's still a very good reason, no doubt about it. But now that she's been running for a bit, there is so much MORE to dislike about her. For example, who is the president of her campaign? Why, it's that sleazy toerag Terry McAuliffe, that's who. The man who so fucked over the Democratic nomination process last time around that we ended up with his cherry-picked "electable" candidate John Kerry. Oh, THAT worked out well, didn't it?

And then, today I read that Hillary ducked the question on whether she believes homosexuality is immoral. Apparently, she believes... it's for "others to conclude." You know what, Senator Clinton? You're courting the gay vote. You're asking for gay money. Fuck you and the horse you rode in on if you can't stand up and simply say "No, I do not. Next question."

I'm not saying I wouldn't vote for her if she (god forbid, spit three times) got the nomination, but I would throw up in my mouth while doing it.

So right now, that leaves me looking to Edwards and Obama. I like them. I don't LIKE them like them, but I like them well enough for now. My boyfriend, George Clooney, is backing Obama so that definitely gives him a bit of an edge because George, ruthless liberal that he is, and I traditionally see eye to eye on all things politic. But... oh, I don't know. I'd actually be more excited if George himself were running. Imagine having a George in the White House who wasn't an international embarrassment and danger to the Constitution.

So yeah. After all that, the big answer is... I don't know, though I'm leaning towards either the guy Clooney likes or the first candidate with enough guts to say "War is immoral, election theft is immoral, letting people go hungry and homeless and without health insurance is immoral, but two dudes kissing I have no problem with."

Hm. I may have just described Dennis Kucinich. Damn it.

Psssst... Earworm, Pass It On!

2007-03-02T07:51:00.000-08:00

I woke up singing this.

I sang it while swimming.

It's going through my head right now.

You're welcome.

Is It Not To Melt?

2007-02-28T16:54:00.001-08:00

Originally uploaded by DigiGirl.

I love Seattle. I adore my wonderful family and the amazing friends I have here. I love my routine, my house, my bed, my coffee pot. As I flew home yesterday, and the plane dropped below the clouds, I sighed with happiness as I saw evergreens instead of palm trees swaying in the breeze. And today, even though that breeze now has knives in it that cut through layers with a reminder that winter isn't quite over yet, I love this town and this life I've made here.

And yet, after four days spent becoming totally smitten with this amazing munchkin and her equally wonderful parents (and feet!), I am bereft, longing for the easy connection and everyday interaction that comes from living in close proximity to the people you love most. We're both blessed and cursed by our mobility and the technology that allows, and sometimes requires, us to pull up roots and sink them where they can't intertwine with their kin.

So since I am rooted in the north, and she is a girl of the south (though thank goodness we're both west!), I'll have to settle for what I can get. If I can't snuggle and smell and sing to her every day, at least I can plan more visits (and soon!) watch her on the video cam and see photos taken just this afternoon of her silly face and curly clean hair and her amazingly funny feet.

But oh, still the ache.

Giggle of the Day

2007-02-12T10:11:00.000-08:00

After blowing her very stuffy nose...

Sophie: How do you make a tissue dance?

Me: Um... play a it a jig?

Sophie: No! Put a little boogie in it!

Monday Morning Reminder

2007-02-05T23:38:00.000-08:00

It would do me well to read this every day, as I attempt to surrender and trust that the Universe will continue to provide as she always has...

Trust
by Thomas R. Smith

It's like so many other things in life
to which you must say no or yes.
So you take your car to the new mechanic.
Sometimes the best thing to do is trust.

The package left with the disreputable-looking
clerk, the check gulped by the night deposit,
the envelope passed by dozens of strangers
all show up at their intended destinations.

The theft that could have happened doesn't.
Wind finally gets where it was going
through the snowy trees, and the river, even
when frozen, arrives at the right place.

And sometimes you sense how faithfully your life
is delivered, even though you can't read the address.

This Is My Message To You-ou-ou

2007-02-02T07:47:00.000-08:00

One might think, reading my blog over time, that I'm quite possibly mildly bi-polar. While that's one way to view it, I prefer my friend Bonnie's description - I have big feelings. Big lows (ah, Molly) and big highs. Today, we're on a definite upswing.

First off, Happy Happy Imbolc! My most favourite of the pagan holidays, and this one has dawned beautifully crisp and sunny. I had a fabulous swim - someone actually complimented me on my kickboarding, go figure. "Three Little Birds" is playing right now and the kids and I are dancing... how can that not lift one's spirits? And since Phil didn't see his shadow for the first time since 1999 spring is officially JUST around the corner.

Then there's the big news... JK Rowling has finished the last Harry Potter book - Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows - and announced that it will be released on July 21st! This kicks planning into high gear in our household, as we promised the kids that we'd go to London for its release. We're all so feckin' excited we hardly know what to do with ourselves. And somehow, by luck or kismet, the date doesn't conflict with any other summer plans. So two weeks in the UK this summer will be spent Harry Pottering, visiting friends, seeing castles... OH! THE EXCITEMENT! If you have any suggestions for things we must see and do with a 7 and 9 year old, please send them on.

R.I.P. Molly (1944-2007)

2007-01-31T21:34:00.000-08:00

One of my heroes died today and my heart broke wide open. When I heard that Molly Ivins had lost her fight with breast cancer, I was in the car on the way to the grocery store, and I immediately started crying. The tears haven't stopped fully since, simmering below the surface, the lump in my throat making it hard to type even now.

I had the pleasure of seeing her once, when she did an appearance with Al Franken here in Seattle in September 2003. She was warm and funny, and mad as hell about what was happening in this country. And she was a fellow supporter of Howard Dean's presidential bid, which made me love her all the more.

She was one-of-a-kind, an amazing, inspirational writer, unabashedly, ruthlessly liberal, and she mercilessly gave the Republicans and the Bush administration in particular exactly the kind of hell they deserved. I'm pretty sure Shrub and Rove and that evil fuck Cheney are raising a glass tonight in thanks that she's gone.

I'm just so sad and angry. If you ever needed proof that life isn't remotely fair, just ponder that we lost Molly's bright light to fucking cancer while the waste of skin in the White House still walks blindly and pathetically among us, doing more damage to our country every day. How utterly ridiculous that she, of all people, will never get to celebrate the end of our long national nightmare when it finally, finally comes (719 days, by my count).

In her final column (god, how it hurts to type that), Molly implores us to get get the hell up and take some action to stop this horrific futile war... to refuse to allow Bush to send more of our men and women to die in his Iraq debacle:

"We are the people who run this country. We are the deciders. And every single day, every single one of us needs to step outside and take some action to help stop this war. Raise hell. Think of something to make the ridiculous look ridiculous. Make our troops know we're for them and trying to get them out of there. Hit the streets to protest Bush's proposed surge. If you can, go to the peace march in Washington on Jan. 27. We need people in the streets, banging pots and pans and demanding, "Stop it, now!"

I've felt so defeated and helpless since November 2004, it's been hard to get my heart back into the process. Even taking back Congress, as much as it pleased me, didn't move me to action. I think back to 2003, how alive and hopeful I felt as Dean's campaign caught fire, as I imagined the possibilities and threw myself utterly and completely behind his candidacy... and I compare it the lukewarm emptiness I feel now when I look at the pool of Democratic candidates.

But in your memory Molly, I will try. I'll try to find some way to act, to make my voice heard as the chorus of NO MORE! grows. I'll try to find some way to re-ignite the spark and the hope. I'll keep my eyes open for the candidate with some Elvis in him, because as you oh-so-preciently predicted last time around, "You can't win without Elvis," and I'll throw my lot in and write and call and caucus and VOTE, speak truth to power, and do what I can to fix what's been so badly broken.

Good-bye, Molly Ivins, hellraiser extraordinaire. We miss you already.

Today's Moment of Duh

2007-01-31T09:36:00.000-08:00

The lead headline on my news portal this morning made me shake my head in wonder:

U.S. May Have Botched Training of Iraqis

WASHINGTON (AP) - Training the police is as important to stabilizing Iraq as building an effective army there, but the United States has botched the job by assigning the wrong agencies to the task, two members of the Iraq Study Group said Wednesday.

"The police training system has not gone well," said former Rep. Lee Hamilton, who co-chaired the bipartisan commission.

You think?

I'm just waiting for tomorrow's headline, Scientists Confirm: World Definitely Round.

WASL meets Pikachu, blood all over

2007-01-28T22:13:00.000-08:00

In April, the boy will be taking the reading and math sections of the WASL (Washington Assessment of Student Learning) for the first time. Starting last week, as a way of helping the students know what kinds of questions to expect, his teacher started sending home practice questions as part of their weekly homework.

And now, apparently, I am having test anxiety on his behalf.

I find this strange because I was one of those freaky kids who enjoyed taking the state standardized tests. I've always tested well, and I loved the shuffling around of the routine during testing week. And as for the kid, he did fine on the practice sheet, and doesn't seem to be at all uptight about the test - what's to worry?

Tell that to my subconscious which treated me to a strange little dream in which Nathan, Sophie and I had to take the test, all together in the same room. But it wasn't your traditional reading and math test, oh no. The questions were these very complex story problems, and the very first one was not only testing math skills, but Pokemon knowledge (oh yes, boy is very much back into Pokemon these days and it's apparently bleeding into my life as well). There were 65 cards in the problem, and I had to figure out which one was the most powerful, based on hit points.

Of course, being in the same room as the kids was distracting me from the task at hand, so in addition to being flummoxed by the subject matter, I was also having a really hard time even understanding what I was being asked to do.

And the time limit was fast approaching...

Aaaagh!

Really. Aren't there other things my dreaming mind could better spend its time on?

Meme Time

2007-01-19T17:22:00.000-08:00

Nabbed from Lil' Miss Sunshine because it's such a cool one. No tags, but if you want to, grab it and go; let me know and I'll link back to you.

The iPod (because really, what else is there?) Shuffle

The Rules:
1. Put your music player on shuffle.
2. Press forward for each question.
3. Use the song title as the answer to the question

What does next year have in store for me?
Do You Hear What I Hear? - Northwest Boychoir
(Eh? What was that?)

What's my love life like?
Let Him Fly - Patty Griffin
(Considering I have no interest in single parenthood, this isn't likely. He can fly right into the kitchen and make me some pie!)

What do I say when life gets hard?
Goodbye - Mark Erelli
(Bwahahahahah! This is so NOT me! Or is it? EEEK!)

What do you think of on waking up?
Be-In - Hair
(Hare Krishna, indeed.)

What song will I dance to at my wedding?
Everyone's Gone To The Moon - Sara Hickman
(Ah - nice slow dreamy song to dance to. But I honestly don't plan to get married again... see # 2)

What do you want as a career?
There's No Crying In Baseball - Tom Hanks
(Okay, this isn't exactly a song, more a quick sound clip. Yet it came up and it's completely accurate. My dream career would involve baseball. So I'm leavin' it.)

Your favourite saying?
The Other Man - Sonia
(I don't think that this is a saying. These days I prefer "Godspeed, little doodle!")

Favourite place?
Big Noise - Eddie From Ohio
(Only if the big noise is from the hot water filling my bath tub.)

What do you think of your parents?
Dreaming of the Queen - Pet Shop Boys
(My mom, the Queen? She'd like that, I'm sure. *grin*)

What's your Pornstar name?
Hold Me Tonight - Red Grammer
(Oh baby!)

Where would you go on a first date?
Shower The People - James Taylor
(Do I know how to have fun or *what*? I'm not sure how the people would feel though. Probably depends on what I'm showering them with.)

Drug of choice?
Younger Than Spring - Dave Matheson
(Yes, it would likely make me feel this way.)

Describe yourself
A Time For Love - Megon McDonough
(I can go with this. I put a pretty big emphasis on the love thing... family, friends, mankind... most everyone except dubya.)

What is the thing i like doing most?
The Letter - Year With Frog and Toad
(Another good one. I spent a lot of time this week sending catch up e-mails to friends, new and old.)

What is my state of mind like at the moment?
I Never Thought I'd Live To Be A Hundred - The Moody Blues
(Eerie. I have been thinking about aging, and how much time has passed in my life... and how much I might have left... and what the hell I want to do with it. And I've even been moodily blue today.)

How will I die?
Ballad of the Dime Store Greaser and the Blonde Mona Lisa - Blue Rodeo
(Greasy, blonde, and smiling enigmatically.)

Take the Weather with You

2007-01-16T05:38:00.000-08:00

It is 5 am. I get up this early a couple of days/week to do the early morning lap swim, but today I sit here, writing, instead. Why?

SNOW. Again. Coming down pretty steadily right now, and Seattle public has already cancelled classes for the day. This is day #6 the kids have missed due to weather, one of them due to the Windpocalypse when millions had no electricity, but the rest because of snowy and icy streets. They'll need to make most, if not all, of them up so they'll be in school until at least June 27th. They are, as you can imagine, NOT amused.

Now, the forecast calls for warming today, so all of this is predicted to turn into rain and wet later. And then... wait for it... REFREEZE overnight. So the chances that I'll be sitting here bitching again tomorrow morning are not insignificant.

I am comletely done with this. I want my drizzle back. I want to see some COLOR again - the green of the grass and evergreens and rosemary bushes. I want the snow to be something that I drive to, and enjoy, rather than something I have to deal with on a daily basis. I am just DONE.

Namaste

2007-01-07T22:36:00.000-08:00

Today.

One last bow at 11 a.m., a roomful of clapping yogis and yoginis, chocolate treats (dark and bitter) for everyone but me, and my weeklong yoga intensive came to an end.

Though I've been a yoga student for 9 years, this was my first experience with such a focused regular practice. My normal routine is one class per week with very occasional home work when the mood hits and I have some time, or when I want to get the kids doing something physical that doesn't involve them chasing each other or jumping on the furniture.

So committing to coming to the mat for an hour and a half every day for a week was a big thing for me. And I have to say that it was - no exaggeration - transformative. I think of myself differently today than I did a week ago. I'm stronger, more limber, more centered and comfortable in my body. I pushed through the soreness and fatigue and reached some brief moments of both physical and mental clarity, where the alignment was there and I had no thought in my head other than now, and no sounds other than the in-and-out of my breath.

And I want more of it. I want it every day, maybe not for a full hour and a half, but at least for the space of a half-dozen sun salutations, for the minute or two of a perfectly balanced headstand.

Last spring I participated in a weekend workshop led by Anusara founder John Friend (and I will do so again in just a few weeks) and the feeling at the end of that weekend was similar, though the practice itself was not as deeply ingrained after only 3 days. It's a feeling I've had just a few times in my life, as if I'm hearing an audible click when I encounter someone that I'm meant to meet or something that I'm meant to do.

This practice is part of my path. I knew it already, but now I know it.

So beginning tomorrow I renew my commitment to give some part of every day to the mat. I'll temper it with enough generosity to myself to be forgiving on those days I'm just not able to make it happen. And I'll see where it leads.

Project 365

2007-01-02T22:58:00.000-08:00

Inspired by this article, I've decided to try taking and posting a photo every day this year. You'll see them show up in the right column - click on the image to go to the full-sized version on flickr with a description of what you're seeing.

I think it's going to be a cool way to document the year. I know I won't be able to blog every day, but hopefully I'll be able to at least take a quick snapshot. Stay tuned, and if you feel so inspired, give it a try yourself and give a shout out in the comments.

In With the New

2007-01-01T21:06:00.000-08:00

I'm an Irish woman
I love weddings and funerals
beginnings and endings
the front and the back...

As I started to write this "Welcome to 2007" post, these lines from Eddie From Ohio's "Baltimore" ran through my head, and I realized how very true it is. I'm a sucker for the thrill and excitement of the new, the blank slate, the fresh start. And I relish the satisfaction of the last lap, the submitted article, the final to-do item crossed off the list. It's just that messy and difficult in-between stuff, the... uh... "work" or "living" I guess you might call it, that I sometimes have trouble with.

Which brings me to my intentions for this brand-spankin' new year, designed to help guide me when I get lost in the inevitable muddle of the 364 days ahead until the next chance to wipe the slate clean. In no particular order, I intend to:

1. Cultivate generosity. I don't necessarily mean this to be in a financial sense, although that can certainly be part of it. But more than that, a generosity of spirit - kindness in thought and action, less blaming, less judging. More reaching out and offering whatever it is I have to offer, whatever it is that others need - whether friends, family, or strangers.

2. Get in better shape. A perennial favourite, certainly, but with a little more urgency as another milestone - the 20th anniversary of my high school graduation - approaches. Yes, it's silly. I don't even know if I'd go to a reunion, to be honest. But hey - I'll take any excuse to kick my butt into gear. I'm doing pretty well on this, actually, as I'll continue with my 2x/week swimming, regular yoga, and at least for the next couple of months quite a bit of skiing.

3. Write what I want to write. Not just more frequent blogging, although yes that too, but planning some essays and working on them and maybe even trying to get them published. I'm finding that since I'm actually making most of my income... um, all of my income... by writing now, I'm losing the enthusiasm for doing work that I won't necessarily get paid for. It makes sense when you think about it, but it doesn't mean I want it to be that way. So I will try to rediscover writing just for the hell of it, because it pleases me.

4. Separate worktime and playtime. I have gotten VERY bad about this one, and as I've been reflecting on what I want to change in the coming year, I keep coming back to the fact that I feel like I'm always on the clock, at least emotionally. Since I've moved to mostly telecommuting, I tend to dawdle during the day and make up for that dawdling by working in the evening. I want to stop this, at least for the most part. It will mean being more disciplined, setting daily mini-goals, and sticking to them. But I know that if I can do it, it opens up some ease and true relaxation time.

5. Make progress on at least one of the following: playing on a softball team, joining a chorus, taking a beading class, organizing our block, volunteering with Seattle 826.

6. Make our home more beautiful. In both big and little ways, I want to work on our space. Among the projects that I'd like to accomplish this year (with Stephen's help, of course): basement remodel, caulk and paint the baseboards and all trim, finishing touches on kids space upstairs, new curtains in living and dining rooms, a sideboard for the dining room, print and frame some more recent photos, paint the front steps and stoop, landscaping back and front, new backyard fence, comfortable and functional patio furniture.

Whew. Lots there, all good. May it be so.

Holiday Plates of Black Food

2006-12-19T09:22:00.000-08:00

Last night, for the first time in probably 25 years, I got to sing along to some songs that hold such a sweet spot in my heart that... well, I was little verklempt. True to form, I remembered 90% of the lyrics (hence my inability recall things like what you call that big white cold thing in the kitchen).

The album: Rudolph The Red Nosed Reindeer. The Label: Peter Pan The artists: The Peppermint Kandy Kids.

The track list:

Side One:
1. Rudolph The Red Nosed Reindeer 1:40
2. Rudolph's Christmas Party 1:46
3. Chris the Christmas Tree 2:17
4. Morris The Moose 1:41
5. Roly Poly The Polar Bear 1:53

Side Two:
1. Here Comes The Rhythm Band 2:39
2. All I Want For Christmas Is My Two Front Teeth 2:05
3. South Pole Calling North Pole (Peter and Penelope Penguin) 2:11
4. A Letter To Santa 2:40
5. I Hear Christmas 1:40

I've been searching for CD or mp3 versions of these songs for a very long time and although I always see a lot of mentions of other people searching for them as well, I've never found the music itself. So this year I asked my mom to see if she still had the vinyl and lo and behold she did. It's even in reasonably good shape without too many scratches or pops. For a limited time, you can download here. Enjoy!

For more great vintage vinyl holiday downloads, check out: FaLaLaLaLa. There you'll find a link to the other Peppermint Kandy Kids album I loved, Santa Claus is Coming To Town.

Windpocalypse 2006

2006-12-16T22:18:00.000-08:00

Holy crap. This has been quite the fall/winter weatherwise in Seattle, has it not? One of the worse windstorms ever, over a million people without power, flash flooding, some people losing their homes, and a few their lives.

And somehow, with all of that going on, the Spencers came out unscathed. Completely. We lost power for an hour the night of the storm and had to deal with the kids' disappointment of missing their last day of school before winter break, but that's it. Not even any branches to pick up. I'm almost afraid to post about it because I don't want the eye of Sauron to turn on us when we're hit by the next act of nature.

We're very thankful, and hope that all of our friends who are dealing with anything from minor inconveniences to all-out life disruptions are able to get back to some semblence of normal soon.

Number One Sign That You Are A Mom

2006-11-30T11:19:00.000-08:00

Discovering that not 10 minutes after dropping your kids off at school after two unexpected days at home plus a 2-hour delayed start to the school day... you miss them already.

Now This Is What I Call A Snow Day

2006-11-29T21:46:00.000-08:00

The family that skis together...
Originally uploaded by spencerUW.

Last night, after we saw that Seattle schools would be closed again today, Stephen said to me "Let's go skiing tomorrow!" I looked at him as if he was crazy, considering the whole reason schools are closed is that roads were awful.

But here's the thing. The roads *were* awful, but only in some places. Our street was fine... as was the nearest arterial. Side streets off that arterial - sheer ice in spots and very steep so for all intents and purposes unpassable.

But lo and behold, DOT told us that the highways were clear. So this morning, our bunch suited up and headed for the mountains. Because when my husband, who is many things but decidedly NOT spontaneous, wants to play hooky and go skiing... who am I to say no?

The skiing was brilliant, possibly the best snow I've skiied on, powdery and dry. The only down side was that it was very cold; 11F/-21C when we left this afternoon to come home. That's too cold to fully enjoy the experience and having experienced it I promise not to complain about the usual mid-twenties we encounter up there ever again.

For Crying Out Loud

2006-11-28T21:42:00.000-08:00

A snow day today. And, guess what?!? Another tomorrow!

Snow days were much more fun when I was a kid. Of course, living in Michigan, snow days required actual SNOW, not just a friggin' inch. But truthfully, the roads are treacherously icy so I understand the logic.

The kids will be thrilled. Maybe we'll bake something.

*sigh*

The White Stuff Again

2006-11-27T21:57:00.000-08:00

...and this time the kids even got me out there to throw some snowballs and build a snowman. It was fun... and now I'm done. Done! Snow needs to go away now. Buh-bye! Back into the mountains where I can go visit and ski on it any time I want, but don't have to drive on it or watch anyone else drive on it, or have it make me cold or late or wet. Begone!

Well, at least until Christmas. Snow on Christmas morning would be really nice.

November Snow

2006-11-26T22:53:00.000-08:00

O Snowy Night
Originally uploaded by monagrrl.

Tonight we watched the snow fall... this photo was taken out the front window by my new Treo 680 (which, by the way, I love with a love that is not quite holy). We get snow that sticks so rarely in Seattle, and this might be the first time since we've lived here that it happened this early in the season.

The kids played outside, in the dark, and came in wet and happy. They're hoping for a snow day tomorrow, but I'm afraid they'll be disappointed... it's already starting to melt...

Tired But Happy Part Deux

2006-11-25T23:22:00.000-08:00

I've just returned from having a woman rub olive oil, warm milk and honey all over my naked and well-scrubbed body.

No, I haven't taken up a new film career, I've spent the evening at my favourite spa. Today was the first time I've experienced the body moisturizing, and I have to say that I'm feeling pretty darn... uh... moist. And a little like a delicious fruit salad.

It was a nice end to another packed day. Nathan ran 1.2 miles to finish up the Seattle Kids Marathon, and the kids and I headed up to Snoqualmie with Anne and Michael to have a snowball fight in the snow. It looked like a winter fairyland, every tree flocked, 20" of new snow in the last 48 hours. So much different than one little week ago.

Tired But Happy

2006-11-24T23:58:00.000-08:00

What a day! Today we:

Did a bit of shopping (netting a new Treo 680 for Stephen and myself, two for the price of one!)

Went up in the Space Needle

Saw Santa Claus

Had lunch and spent the afternoon at the EMP/SFM

Walked through Pike Place Market

Enjoyed a lovely egg nog latte

Took in a most excellent concert at The Triple Door - The Paperboys (and I can't believe that this was the first time Stephen and I had seen them - WOW!)

And now... sleep, blessed sleep.

Giving Thanks

2006-11-23T22:11:00.000-08:00

Oh, what a nice day and fabulous meal with friends and family. I'm not sure if my stomach hurts because I laughed so much or because I stuffed myself... and I guess it doesn't really matter, in the end.

'Twas The Night Before Turkey Day

2006-11-22T21:52:00.000-08:00

... and our friends Anne and Michael have arrived from the UK for our now traditional visit. Well, at least it's a tradition with Anne; this is Michael's first time. It's fun to share this most American holiday (although as Michael pointed out tonight, the Pilgrims were still British citizens so the Brits really have a claim on it too).

Oh and the chocolate they brought. *sigh* Green and Black's Organic, several bars. Stephen and the kids partook while I nabbed the dark with almonds and placed it high on a shelf to be sampled... oh, who am I kidding?... completely devoured in one sitting on opening day.

Now we wait for tomorrow. Bring on the turkey, yo.

Repent Seattle!

2006-11-21T16:27:00.000-08:00

Wowee. I guess that the deity really is pissed at us godless heathens in the Emerald City. Either that or Zule is preparing to welcome Gozer the Destroyer.

Just in case... no one think of anything. Clear your minds!

The image was captured today during a kick-ass afternoon thunderstorm... we're not used to 'em here, so it's always a (short-lived) treat. We also got some hail, and now it's very very cold. I think that we need to watch out for the frogs next.

Read more about it here.

Call Me.. Impressed

2006-11-20T15:03:00.000-08:00

I was going to report that Nathan is reading Moby Dick. But since he blew through it in 2 days, I have to alter the verb tense and report that he has read Moby Dick. It's the children's illustrated version, with no long dry descriptions of how whale blubber is processed, but still!

And for those parents who have any issues at all with their kids reading comics rather than "real" books, let me also report that Nathan's interest in the tale of the great white whale was formed while reading Bone, a comic series which has numerous references to the story. I think it's true that if you get 'em reading anything, as long as they enjoy it, you're on your way to having a reader.

Things That Are Not Fun

2006-11-19T21:57:00.000-08:00

Skiing. In the rain. Very NOT fun.

Okay, that's the only not fun thing I have to talk about today. Since I pinkie-promised the girl, we skiied today, even though it was nearly 40 in the mountains and so the rain that was falling in Seattle when we headed out was still rain even above the snow line. Yet the lifts were going and so we took two runs down a very soggy hill.

It's strange being out so early in the season... it was definitely not busy (other people also seem to grok that skiing in the rain is not fun) and it's odd seeing no big snowdrifts and even some bare patches that need to be skiied around.

Still, given that the conditions were rotten, we're now set up with our rentals and we've knocked the rust off our skills. The kids did great and astoundingly so did I. I think it's going to be a fun season.

But not in the rain. Ever again.

Respite From The Rain

2006-11-18T21:01:00.000-08:00

Today was a much-needed dry day - we've have precious few of them this month - so the kids and I did the workin' outside thing... raked, weeded, tidied, etc. Then after watching Michigan lose a close one to OSU (damn it), we biked to Top Pot where they enjoyed a donut and I partook of some nice joe. A little shopping, some banking, dinner and a movie later, and they're happily in bed dreaming of the skiing we've got planned tomorrow.

It's Saturday night and it's all good.

Bye, Bo

2006-11-17T20:42:00.000-08:00

Bo Schembechler died today. How strange life is, that his heart gives out on him the day before the big... no, make that BIG! UM/OSU game tomorrow. I have fond memories of Bo leading the Wolverines while I was there, and though they were tarnished a bit by his stint in the Tigers front office (OY - he fired Ernie Harwell, fer cryingoutloud), I still am saddened by his passing. An amazing coach, one of the best of all time with a lifetime record of 234-64-8.

Hopefully he and Woody Hayes will be sitting somewhere tomorrow in another plane of existence, watching the game together.

And hopefully the boys will be inspired to take it to the Buckeyes and win one for Bo.

The White Stuff Returneth

2006-11-16T23:15:00.000-08:00

The corollary to this being Seattle's wettest November in history is that all this rain means snow in the mountains and ski season getting off to a nice early start! The Summit at Snoqualmie will be open this weekend and we have shiny new passes just waiting to be used!

Sadly, Stephen is leaving on a weekend business trip tomorrow, and I really don't know if I'm up for taking the kids up for the first time this season myself. It usually takes me several runs down the hill before I stop saying words that children shouldn't hear and questioning my own sanity.

But oh I am mightily tempted.

Make My (Kids) Mix

2006-11-15T23:45:00.000-08:00

I spent way too much time tonight playing with iTunes, working on a "Sleepytime Love Mix" for the kids - well, mostly for Nate as Soph doesn't listen to music right before bedtime. I got sucked in to all the good music I've got, and it was hard to pull myself away. Here's what I came up with.

Sleepytime Love Mix

The One Who Knows - Dar Williams
Walk Humbly, Son - Eddie From Ohio
If Only You Knew - Moxy Früvous
Lullabye (Goodnight, My Angel) - Billy Joel
Burgundy Heart-Shaped Medallion - David Wilcox
Words - Bee Gees
Falling Is Like This - Ani DiFranco
Gentle Arms of Eden - Dave Carter & Tracy Grammer
Oh My Brother - Eddie from Ohio
Hey Kind Friend - Indigo Girls
Find The River - R.E.M.
Down To The River To Pray - Alison Krauss
May It Be - Enya
Into The West - Annie Lennox
Caledonia - Dougie MacLean
Hummingbird - Kris Delmhorst
The Moon And St. Christopher - Mary Chapin Carpenter
Lilly Wants A Mountain - Pete Droge
Somewhere Over The Rainbow - IZ
The Lion Sleeps Tonight - Ladysmith Black Mambazo

But Sometimes Tuesdays Do

2006-11-14T23:20:00.000-08:00

And when they do, what better time to remember that even the sucky days count toward that final number, and so should be enjoyed in whatever way they can... the sun shining when I awoke this morning, work well-done, salmon and glazed carrots for dinner, kisses from my kids.

The People Through the Train Window
by Dick Allen

All we’ll ever know of them are the lights
of their houses in the late evening winter,
and that their lives are intertwined as ours;
as lonely as a Scott Fitzgerald story.
Born to rush out on the earth and die;
how strangely we behave, as if it were not true
that there will be old gravestones up above our bodies,
and our children will be thinking of us sometime.
How else can I say it? We will die
and not come back, not ever, not return
to mystic restaurants and words we’ve spoken softly,
strokings, glances, and confessions, and
the seasons of this lovely planet will take no
notice of our vanishing; my hands
will lie as silently as yours; the wind
above the planet will not touch your eyes,
nor, within a hundred years, one face
of those within the houses with the lighted rooms.
Can we imagine that? All dead, all dead,
all of us dead, who never lived enough.
Good Lord, the carpe diem poets in their graves
were so right that it makes me tremble when
I think of falling into love, and out, and in again,
or listen to Jim Croce in his Creole voice.
Seize the day, oh seize the day, oh seize
your life with every tendon, every thought you have;
the moonlight hits the window, and the stars
have always gone this crazy in their crazy sky.

Mondays Don't Always Suck

2006-11-13T21:53:00.000-08:00

Case in point: today was a very good day and I am content.

My swim today was effortless (other than the getting out of bed part).

One chapter of my work life is nearly complete and another may very well be beginning soon (more on this as it unfolds).

Nathan's school conference was this afternoon and it went very well... I love his teacher and the way she interacts with him, I love that he takes a pride in the areas that he excels in, and I love that he's motivated to work on improving the areas that need improvement. It's all good with that boy, as challenging as he can be for me to parent sometimes.

Sophie has created and posted a list in the living room titled "My favrotie thigs". The list includes "hello kittie, pony's unacone's, faries, Strobarry Sortecake, Balto the Sled dog, mom and dad, brother, Sophie" and in the first column, each item has "love it" next to it. It makes me smile each time I see it.

Not A Real Girl

2006-11-12T21:28:00.000-08:00

We ended up at the mall today which is not unlike hell for me. It's just..."too." Too much noise, too much stuff, too much of my kids pointing out every last everlovin' thing they want, too much of me continually having to say "no."

The high point of today's trip, however, aside from Nathan hitting the emergency stop button on the escalator (good times!), was an appreciative comment from my husband after I had finished drooling over the swords in the window of the cutlery place. As we walked on, he stopped me and said, "You know what makes you different from most women? I have to drag you away from the swords, yet you walk right by the jewelry store next door to it without even noticing it's there. I like that about you."

I looked up and sure enough - there was a jewelry store and I had been so busy trying to decide if I'd rather have Sting or Anduril (Sting is much more my size, hobbit-like creature that I am, but Anduril is soooo pretty), that I hadn't even seen it was there, not that I would have wanted to stop anyway, but still.

I like that about me too. :)

Albert Einstein Was Never Good At Math

2006-11-11T21:23:00.000-08:00

Someone on an online discussion group I follow posted a link to this article today:

The Myth of Prodigy and Why it Matters

It's a really interesting look at how gifted children don't necessarily - and in fact aren't especially likely to - become gifted adults. From the article:

We think of precociousness as an early form of adult achievement, and, according to Gladwell, that concept is much of the problem. “What a gifted child is, in many ways, is a gifted learner. And what a gifted adult is, is a gifted doer. And those are quite separate domains of achievement.”

It's amazing to me what a relief it is to read this. I was one of those so-called "gifted" kids, reading early, participating in special classes in elementary school, excelling on the college prep track, getting 5's on AP exams, graduating valedictorian. Then I went to college and found out that even though I was smart enough, I was by no means all that and a bag of genius chips. Now that I'm in my late 30's, I've come to appreciate, most of the time, that I'm an intelligent, well-read woman who is still curious and still learning and might just surprise herself one day by actually writing that novel she feels she has in her.

But there's still that part - I was going to say "that little part," but in all honesty it's bigger than I'd like to admit - that feels like a big ole failure. What happened to all that potential? When exactly did I squander it irrevocably?

The answer, this article would say, is that I've squandered nothing. I succeeded remarkably at being a gifted kid, at learning early and well. And then I grew up, and a lot of other people caught up with me. Nothing wrong with that.

It also makes me feel better about something that I'm actually embarrased to admit I fret about on occasion... that my kids haven't yet displayed any particular intellectual precociousness, that they've not been singled out as gifted or "above average" (at the ripe old ages of 6 and 8). That they're "only" smart, funny, socially comfortable kids who do well in school, sing, dance, play sports, love to read, write and draw. Of course I worry about that, right? Because that part of me (the one that's not as little as I'd like) sees their "lack" of giftedness as a reflection on me, a confirmation of my own mediocrity.

Yeah. Embarrassing. Get over myself already.

But the part of the article that grabbed me and that gave me hope for my own future virtuousity, as well as that of my kids was this:

Really what we mean … when we say that someone is ‘naturally gifted’ is that they practice a lot, that they want to practice a lot, that they like to practice a lot.”

What a concept. To get really good at something, to be an above-average success at it, you have to like it, want to do it and... do it. Hard work, desire, and dedication are going to move you farther along the path of achievement than coasting on innate talent.

In other words, all I have to do is overcome that laziness thing, and there's no telling what I can accomplish.

Wherein I Babble and Lust After Rats

2006-11-10T21:25:00.000-08:00

Happy Veterans Day (Observed)!

Wait... that seems strange. Does one actually wish a Happy Veterans Day? I guess so, yes, why not!

But is it Veterans or Veteran's?

And I have to say, when you type "Veterans" several times in a row, it starts to look very wrong.

Regardless, 'twas a rainy, cold one here in Seattle and the kids and Stephen were home. I was home too, but I always am these days so that was no big whoop. I went to the bead shop and got some supplies for our very possibly ill-fated Christmas projects, the kids had play dates, and then this evening we went to see Flushed Away. Highly recommended - it's a very funny and enjoyable movie with some nice homages, great music, and plenty of Aardman references for the sharp-eyed to find.

And though this is a something I thought I'd never say, it's true: Kate Winslet is just as hot as a rat as she is as a person.

Servicus Interruptus

2006-11-09T23:03:00.000-08:00

Annoying bad bad bad Qwest. They can't tell me why, they can't tell me how long it will last, they can't tell me if it will happen again. Tonight it was 2 1/2 hours, a few days ago it was 3, on-and-off it will happen for 10 minutes or so, during which time if I'm lucky I can jump onto an open network on my block.

Tonight I talked to Paolo... a very nice guy with a pleasing accent who could offer me no help at all beyond noting in my file that a very grumpy woman was suffering internet withdrawal, was mad as hell, and wasn't going to take it anymore. Oh, I was actually pretty nice, knowing that he's just the guy answering the phone, trying to do his job and not getting paid nearly enough to deal with me in full shit fit mode. I'll save my ire for someone in the business office when I call tomorrow to demand some answers, or if no answers then a big freakin' credit on this month's bill.

Yup. That's all I've got. I've officially turned into the most boring blogger evah.

Wisdom

2006-11-08T22:52:00.000-08:00

Be humble, for you are made of dung. Be noble, for you are made of stars.
-Serbian proverb

I feel like I want to say more, but my own words just won't come right now. It's a strange mix of emotions today - some gratitude, some worry, some hope, some sadness. Just generally unsettled and unfocused.

Still, I wanted to share this great quote that Eddie From Ohio's Robbie shared with us at tonight's concert. It was a wonderful show, and so much fun to be there with the kids. We got them shirts which Robbie and Julie signed afterwards; they were so kind, and the kids were very excited to meet and thank them.

I love how my little ones love the music. We're doing something right, even if sometimes parenthood leaves me feeling more than excretory than astral.

Cautious Optimism

2006-11-07T21:25:00.000-08:00

Wow.

I have to say it's looking good so far. I mean... 23 seat pickup in the House, 3 in the Senate. And more to come - could be as many as +32 and +5. Just wow.

I have hope, for the first time in a long time, that we can start to undo some of the damage this horrific president and his puppet Congress have done. But we have to run with this opportunity and really make things happen - and soon. If the Dems can do this... start cleaning up the mess in Iraq, re-establish civil liberties and the rule of law, make the environment a priority, repeal the rich's tax cuts, clean up the rot and corruption in DC...

if they take the trust they've been handed and execute faithfully...

this could be a very good day indeed.

Oh, The Mirth

2006-11-06T17:33:00.000-08:00

Stolen shamelessly after seeing it on Terrilynn's blog because, on the night before one of the biggest elections in our history doesn't everyone need a laugh?

Good Things Come...

2006-11-05T23:01:00.000-08:00

In our household this fall, Sunday nights are typically reserved for watching The Amazing Race. It's a special treat for the kids, that even on a school night they get to stay up until 9pm, root on their favourite teams, decide which challenges they would or wouldn't do, and plan for the time that they're old enough to get on the show themselves.

All that being said, it didn't happen tonight - thank goodness our friend TiVo was ready and willing to step up for us. Instead, some friends watched the kids while Stephen and I headed over to the Tractor Tavern for a CD release party for a singer/songwriter we both like very much - Karen Pernick, whose new album is called Two Kinds of Weather.

Her first CD, Apartment 12 was on constant rotation for quite a while after its release in 1996. Yes, you read that right - 10 years, we've waited for a new one. I liked her first so much, I e-mailed Karen, who had no web site (remember, it was 1996 and very few people did), and asked her if she wanted one. She wrote back and said yes so I put together the very first iteration of karenpernick.com, then met her for dinner when she played a Six String Concerts show in '97. I didn't get a chance to talk with her tonight after the show, but maybe I'll drop her another note sometime to see if she remembers me. :)

Anyway, the show was great. Karen is as lovely as ever, her voice is like buttah, and the new songs are terrific. She was joined onstage by the musicians she worked with on the album, no-name slackers like Wayne Horvitz (who also produced the record) and Robin Holcomb. It was also nice to see Julie Wolf come up onstage to do some backing vocals on "Apartment 12."

One funny thing... we ended up getting to the Tractor about 45 minutes early, while Karen and the band were still sound checking. So we queued up in the rain (under the awning, luckily), waiting until they opened the doors. This is funny only because this used to be what Stephen and I would do before every general admission show we attended... we always liked to be there to have our pick of seats or standing room near the stage. It's been several years and two kids since we've been early enough to do that. Made me feel all twenty-something again.

Celebrate Good Times

2006-11-04T22:44:00.000-08:00

It's a weekend of fun and frolic! From EMP last night to a lovely girls night out with my coolmom friends (minus one) tonight. It's become a yearly, or nearly so, tradition, dinner out at the oldest Mexican restaurant in Seattle, Mama's Mexican Kitchen. (Geek note to anyone who pays attention to such things: check out Mama's URL. They are OLD school.) In addition to the great company, margaritas, and food, we have come to expect that it will pour (check) and that we will get the waitress we love (check). We didn't get to sit in the Elvis room, but I guess one can't have everything.

I did get to spend a goodly amount of time holding the lovely Ms. Piper, aka The Best Baby Ever. And I was reminded again how much I enjoy this group of women. Our friendship is conducted mostly via e-mail (and mea culpa, I've been a very poor correspondent over the last few months), and we don't get together nearly as often as we should, but whenever do I'm reminded how glad I am to count them among some of my oldest Seattle friends.

In other news... it is raining. A lot. With more to come. Talking with various friends whose kids are still playing soccer for a few more weeks, I've never been so thankful that my kids' soccer seasons ended LAST weekend.

When You Wish Upon A Star...

2006-11-03T21:40:00.000-08:00

Just back from a lovely family date night. We took the kids out for dinner and then to the Experience Music Project for a member's preview of the new exhibit that opens this weekend, The Music Behind the Magic. The exhibit examines Disney's musical history, from Annette Funicello on the Mickey Mouse Club to Julie Andrews as Mary Poppins to the phenomenon that is High School Musical.

Thumbs up all around, especially for the special performance of Jodi Benson, the woman who voiced Ariel in The Little Mermaid. As expected, my eyes ran pretty much through the whole thing. I'm such a sap.

Brilliance Or Insanity? You Be The Judge!

2006-11-02T16:42:00.000-08:00

There are two LARGE bags of candy sitting in the kitchen, candy that my kids braved the bitter cold to procure on Halloween night. In fact, counting the bag of leftovers that didn't get handed out (said cold kept all but a handful of wee ghosties away), there are three.

Now, knowing that I have a wicked sweet tooth, and that I have personally seen, with my own eyes, dozens of Twix and Butterfingers in those bags and furthermore that I work from home full-time now and so am left completely alone with said three large bags of candy, you'd think this story probably has a predictable ending, right? And it probably involves me gaining five pounds, hiding candy wrappers under the coffee grounds in the garbage can, and explaining to the children that they've eaten a lot more candy than they thought they had.

Well HA! That is NOT the way it's going down with those three bags of candy. Because...

oh sweet mother what have I done?

I have given up chocolate.

Until April.

April 1st, to be exact.

Opening Day, 2007.

It seemed like a good idea at the time, and as it turns out it actually worked! Kind of. I made this sacrifice to the Baseball Gods just after they lost game 1 of the ALDS to the Yankees. "Oh merciful Baseball Gods," I pleaded. "Please help my Tigers get to the World Series, and if you do I promise to give up...

thinks quickly... has to be a true sacrifice, but nothing so harsh that I can't follow through on it. Too late to offer the firstborn. Sex? No! Alcohol? Ha! Sweets? N-... well, maybe not ALL sweets, but what about chocolate? Yeah, that's painful, shows I'm serious, but it's definitely do-able...

...CHOCOLATE! From now until... Opening Day next year! Just get 'em to the Series!"

And then... lo and behold, the Tigers won 7 in a row. American League Champions! World Series, baby! And I patted myself on the back, oh I did I did.

And then... well, we don't have to go into what happened next. Hoping the magic would work again, I offerred to extend the chocolate sacrifice, until the next World Series. Yes, you read that right. A whole YEAR. Never doubt how much I love my Tigers.

But the Gods were no longer listening. Or if they were it was in that "Well what more do you want from us we made the Cards hit easy grounders to your pitchers but even we couldn't help them when they kept overthrowing the 1st and 3rd basemen" way.

So the candy sits in the three bags, veritable mountains of chocolately goodness. And every once in awhile I walk into the kitchen and veer towards them, and then remember and walk forlornly away. Because I know that if I don't follow through on this promise that I will have absolutely no cred next year when we're in a close race for the AL Central with the Sox or Twins and I ask for that come-from-behind victory, or that strikeout with the bases loaded.

The only upside is that it's going to be a lot easier to get through the holidays without gaining that five pounds when chocolate is completely off the table. Halloween... Christmas... Easter... *sigh* Cold comfort, but I'll take what I can get.

And of course... there's always Skittles.

KBloWriMo 2: Electric Boogaloo

2006-11-01T16:42:00.000-08:00

It's November 1st, and you know what that means... the second annual KBloWriMo! The first was such a success, and so much fun to do, that I couldn't help but do it again. And this year, someone else ran with the idea and made it an actual "thing" - NaBloPoMo. Quite a list of participants she has signed up and although at first I resisted, I finally, just minutes ago, decided to be a joiner. Baa. :)

I feel like November is going to be a very good month, I have to say. October was... it was wonderful and weird and crazy and disappointing and I'm honestly glad that it's over. Thanks to everyone who wrote or commented or called to offer their condolences on the Tigers losing, in a craptacular fashion, the World Series. Baseball gods love 'em, they just plain choked, and it was NOT the exciting ending I was hoping for. Still, they made it to the Show, and I love them for that and the season they gave us die-hards who have suffered for SO long.

Work life is shifting, yet again, as I finish up with one job without really having anything solidly in place to transition into. That's both really liberating and really scary, but I've got lots of irons in the fire that could... um... whatever the heck it is the irons in the fire do. Get hot, I guess. In any case, I feel that good things could be coming soon, although I'm willing to admit that could be the giddiness of the first day of KBloWriMo talking. It's like Christmas, but with words!

And those are all the words I have time for today - we are bereft of potatoes, so off I must go a-hunting and a-gathering. But guess what? There will be more buttery wordy goodness tomorrrow, my poppets, so be sure to check back.

Blessings

2006-10-22T16:37:00.000-07:00

Welcome to the world little niecelet of my heart, Maeve Olivia Rilo Searcy! Born October 21 at 8:57pm, just squeaking in on the Libra side of the cusp. Congrats wee one - you picked yourself some great parents!

Photos coming soon, I hear tell.

We can't wait to meet you.

A Decade And Counting...

2006-10-18T17:15:00.000-07:00

I bet you're wondering if there is anything going on in my life right now other than baseball. Why yes, my 3 loyal friends who haven't stopped reading entirely out of sheer boredom with my Tiger obsession - there ARE other things going on, thank you for asking.

In fact, today - despite the rain and chill that have settled in now that Seattle has remembered that it's fall - today is a lovely day because my sweetie and I have been married for 10 years! TEN! That's a lot of years for someone to put up with me (keep those checks coming, mom). Thanks, love. And Happy Anniversary.

No big celebration is planned due to circumstances that require me to be working (yep) for a bit this evening. But we'll do a nice night out soon, and spend some time wondering aloud what this grand adventure called "our lives together" will look like once another decade has gone by.

This one has taken us from one side of the country to the other and brought us two fabulous children, with a good dollop of ease and contentment thrown in for good measure. I've no intention or desire to move or have more kidlets, so I'm happy to concentrate on increasing that dollop to a metric ton or so.

Bless You Boys, 2006

2006-10-14T23:51:00.000-07:00

Joy in Tiger Town

Twenty-two years ago today the 1984 Detroit Tigers - our beloved Bless You Boys - won game 5 vs. the Padres and became World Series Champions. It seemed the inevitable outcome of a dream season where the team jumped out to a 35-5 start and led the division wire-to-wire. The names still bring a smile to my face: Trammell, Whittaker, Evans, Parrish, Gibson, Brookens, Lemon, Bergman, Petry, Morris, Wilcox, Hernandez, and of course, Sparky Anderson.

Today, the 2006 Detroit Tigers won the American League pennant in a most dramatic fashion (and isn't that the best way?)... a come-from-behind victory capped by a walk-off 3 run homerun with 2 outs in the bottom of the 9th, completing a 4-game sweep of the Oakland A's. It couldn't have been scripted any better. And now the smiles come from Polanco, Guillen, Inge, Casey, Rodriguez, Robertson, Rogers, Verlander, Bonderman, Ordonez, Granderson, Monroe, and, of course, Jim Leyland.

In 1984 I took for granted that this is how baseball would always be... that the Tigers would be in the thick of the pennant race year after year, and the World Series would be a frequent event. It almost happened again in '87, but didn't. And then came the years and years of wandering in the wilderness.

Now, I know better. And so although I believe this team is just getting started, that they have years of good baseball ahead of them, I certainly won't take what they've accomplished this year for granted. I'm savoring every moment, storing some memories, filling up my reservoir of baseball optimism and joy to carry me through those seasons to come that won't live up to all we hope.

So congratulations to the Detroit Tigers, 2006 American League Champions. You done great. Now rest well, and we'll see you next week in the Series.

Thank You

2006-10-08T08:43:00.000-07:00

fans

I haven't stopped smiling.

The disappointment of the last week of the season is completely forgiven.

Thank you.

Pitching performances of a lifetime by Kenny and Jeremy - wow. The boys carrying Leyland off the field on their shoulders. Bringing out the champagne and celebrating with the fans. And beating the "unbeatable" Yankees. It doesn't get any better than that.

Now it's on to Oakland on Tuesday and 4 more wins to get to the Series. But regardless of the outcome next week, I'm just so proud to be a Tigers fan today.

And I thought of something last night. Getting an extra month to play means one month LESS to wait until next season starts.

October baseball ROCKS! :)

Into The Swim

2006-10-06T10:21:00.000-07:00

"Honey, it's 5:30."

"Mmmmph."

"Beep beep beep."

"You know, I'm tired. I think I'm going to just sleep."

A minute passes. I tell myself it's okay to go back to sleep, I DESERVE to sleep. I can start this routine next week. Another minute passes. I think about my new suit, and how I HAD to go buy it last night so that I could get up and swim this morning. I open one eye. I think about the Tigers, and how they got up yesterday on less-than-optimal sleep and played some damn fine baseball, beating Jeter's team and evening the series. The other eye opens. I think about the commitment I had made to swim twice/week, and how failing to honor it could anger the baseball gods, causing them to turn their backs on my team. That does it.

"Aw crap, I'm awake now. Fine. Thank you. And I really mean that."

"Zzzzzzzz."

So began my day. Out of bed and to the pool, for a nice 3/4 mile swim at a decent clip with my new red suit and goggles with a strap that didn't break. I'm rediscovering my love of swimming - I'm not sure why I've waited so long to get back to it. I'm good at it, have good form, am moderately speedy. I even ended up in the fast lane today because the medium lane was crowded and very slow.

I feel virtuous and productive regardless of whatever else I do or don't accomplish today. It's all killing time anyhow with "work" and "life" (what-EVER) until 5pm when I get to spend another 3 hours of intense stress, hopefully capped off by intense joy. Go get 'em Tigers! ROWR!

Public Service Announcement: Beware the Beer

2006-10-05T15:01:00.000-07:00

beer
Originally uploaded by monagrrl.

Ex-Representative Republican Mark Foley claims that he sends suggestive messages to young boys because he's an alcholic - the devil's liquid made him do it.

Okay, I personally have had a drink or two. I've even been... shhhh... drunk. On occasion. Maybe once. And I can assure you that having alcohol in my system did not cause me to want to diddle young boys. Or young girls. The hot guy who lived on the 2nd floor in my dorm, sure. My husband after a particularly spirited foosball game. But we were all above the legal age of consent.

I guess it just works that way for Republicans. So keep your kids away from drunk ones.

The hypocrisy is nearly too much to stand. The "family values" party that is scared of two (legally consenting) dudes kissing, turns their back and ignores it when one of their own uses their position of power to send dirty e-mail to minors. If it wasn't so utterly gross and horrible, it would be almost funny.

(This image was photoshopped by my friend Grim on my Tiger forum, and I just had to share. Brilliant, no?)

On Second Thought

2006-10-04T21:38:00.000-07:00

Yeah, you know the whole "I don't hate Derek Jeter" thing from earlier today? Well, thanks to the ESPN pre-game-that-was-postponed-until-tomorrow show, I've moved ever so much closer to, if not hate, then an intense dislike of the man. Because there's nothing that sets one's teeth on edge like being verbally assaulted for two hours with "Dude, Derek Jeter is the AWESOMEST ballplayer - nay! - human BEING who has ever walked the face of this planet. He can hit, hit can throw, he can run and - get this - he's kind to puppies, children, and nuns."

If Jeter Christ is so damned amazing, why didn't he just snap his fingers and part the skies over Yankee Stadium so they could have played the GAME?

Things I Feel Good About Today

2006-10-04T07:33:00.000-07:00

Okay, so the first game of the ALDS didn't go as well as I would have liked. Nate pitched a good game; not the great game we needed to win, but a good one. Still, I was impressed that our boys - coming off a disheartening end to the season and most of whom hadn't seen any postseason action - could walk into Yankee Stadium and hold their own, but for one bad inning.

Let me say it now - and I may say it again, so sue me - I despise the Yankees. Even if it wasn't us who was playing them, I would still despise them. I hate their hubris, their sense of entitlement. I hate how the national sports media fawns over them, ignoring every other team (except maybe the Red Sox)... honestly, if you weren't a Tiger fan, you might not have known WHO the Yankees were playing, if they were playing anyone or just having a little intra-squad action. And I reserve a special hate for Jason Giambi, that steroid-enhanced, greasy, disgusting representative of all that is wrong with baseball. Ick, ick, ick.

The only Yankee I can't bring myself to hate is Derek Jeter. I'm not sure why, maybe it's that he is truly a phenomenal ballplayer and seemingly decent guy. Maybe it's his appearance on SNL a few years back doing the "Derek Jeter's Taco Hole" skit, the jingle of which I still sing every time I see him. Whatever.

So back to things I feel good about. I love that I get to see my team play, that baseball is still relevant to me in October. THAT hasn't happened for a very long time. I'm feeling that good things are going to happen this week on the writing front. I feel oh-so-virtuous that I got up this morning at 5:30 and swam laps for 40 minutes - I'm going to try to do it a couple of times/week as I do love swimming. And I feel good that I'm here, blogging again. I've missed it and I'll try to do it more often in the coming weeks as KBloWriMo is just around the corner.

Best Birthday Present Ever

2006-09-24T15:09:00.000-07:00

THE TIGERS ARE IN THE PLAYOFFS!

"They are winners now, and forever will be winners." -Jim Leyland

Good Stuff

2006-09-23T12:06:00.000-07:00

A Morning In Autumn
by W.S. Merwin

Here late into September
I can sit with the windows
of the stone room swung open
to the plum branches still green
above the two fields bare now
fresh-plowed under the walnuts
and watch the screen of ash trees
and the river below them

and listen to the hawk's cry
over the misted valley
beyond the shoulder of woods
and to lambs in a pasture
on the slope and a chaffinch
somewhere down in the sloe hedge
and silence from the village
behind me and from the years

and can hear the light rain come
the note of each drop playing
into the stone by the sill
I come slowly to hearing
then all at once too quickly
for surprise I hear something
and think I remember it
and will know it afterward

in a few days I will be
a year older one more year
a year farther and nearer
and with no sound from there on
mute as the native country
that was never there again
now I hear walnuts falling
in the country I came to

Public Grovelling To The Forgiving and Benevolent Gods Of Baseball

2006-09-12T17:46:00.000-07:00

Apparently in the blog post before this, when I was celebrating .500 with a little too much enthusiasm, I pissed off the Baseball Gods but good... since then, the Tigers have won only 5 games. They're now in danger of losing the division that they've led since May.

Now, I'm not sneezing at a winning season, really I'm not. We've come an incredibly long way and I'm grateful, oh-so-grateful. But... please. Please please please please please... I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Mea Culpa. Don't punish this team for my hubris... they've worked so hard. I'll be a better fan, I promise. I'll watch or listen to every game from here on out, even if we're behind by a gajillion runs, I'll hang in there 'til the end, win or lose.

The dancing Tiger has been removed and will not see the light of day unless/until the Tigers make the post-season. The author of the previous post has been sacked.

Gimme a RAWR!

2006-08-22T21:55:00.000-07:00

The Tigers have won 81 games. There are 162 games in a season. This means, the Tigers will have, even if they win not a single one of their 36 remaining games, a .500 record.

For the first time since 1993, the Tigers are going to have a winning season.

There's only one POSSIBLE way for me to react to that.

{blatant symbol of excitement and premature celebration removed}

Nice work, boys. But... please win some more games.

Or Not

2006-08-20T23:02:00.000-07:00

The Lady Washington
Originally uploaded by monagrrl.

So that "good sore" turned into a "strained right quad" after I pulled it doing some moving and lifting of stuff and then on Friday morphed into a "severely strained right quad" after I used it to keep myself from falling down the basement stairs when a cat in the way (HEEENRY!) made my foot slip. I'm better today, can actually walk without pain, but geez. I guess it's true, the body ain't as resilient as it used to be.

Nevertheless, there were some very nice parts to this weekend. On Saturday we took the kids to see the Lady Washington (AKA the HMS Interceptor in the first Pirates of the Caribbean movie) which was docked down on Lake Union. What a beautiful ship. Hopefully the next time she comes this way, I'll find out about it soon enough to get us signed up to actually sail on her. We were driving home from doing some errands in the afternoon and saw her out with her sails unfurled. Make me heart hurt.

I just really want to be a pirate.

But, with me gimpy leg, I'm not sure how well I'd do at the lootin' and plunderin'. Drinkin' rum, I'm sure I could handle.

Aaaarh.

But It's a Good Sore

2006-08-06T22:07:00.000-07:00

Oh.

Oh.

I am going HURT tomorrow. Today was the big Seattle post office softball tournament and we played 4 games back-to-back-to-back-to-back. Our record for the day was 2-2. And while my fantasy of superstardom didn't play out exactly as I'd hoped, I did manage to get on base a couple of times, bat in a couple of runs, and not make any heinous fielding errors. I spent most of my time playing right field and catcher, passably. All in all, as much as I might expect since I haven't played a whole game since I was on my college Arts Chorale team. Note to self: join a softball team next season. You had a great time.

But man. The muscles are reminding me that I have been neglecting the body big-time. And tomorrow is only going to be worse.

Tigers swept the Indians - yay! A's swept the Mariners - boo!

In other news, we are once again a gender-balanced household with the return of our guys. Both had good trips and I'm in awe of the amount of progress Nathan made on his music in one week; we were treated to a concert when we picked him up, and they sounded fantabulous.

Girls Just Wanna Have Fun

2006-07-30T23:44:00.000-07:00

... but dayum, we're gonna miss our boys. This is a week of firsts for our family, as girlie and I are holding down the fort whilst Stephen is in Boston at SIGGRAPH and boyo is at choir camp in Tacoma. It's his first sleepaway camp, the longest he's been away from the parental units (we'll see him on Weds for visiting day, but we won't bring him home until next Saturday). It's also the first extended time that girlie and I have spent completely alone together... being second-born, she missed out on all that one-on-one stuff.

So. We've planned our meals, done our shopping, and made cookies to take on Wednesday. He called to let us know he's having a good time and enjoyed dinner; she's sleeping soundly in my bed. Laundry and dishes are done, cats and fish are fed, and I'm halfway done with article I have due on Wednesday.

It's very very quiet.

Sleep well, my far-flung family members. Come home soon.

Today's Horoscope

2006-07-27T13:23:00.000-07:00

If a project is coming to an end, don't try to prolong its demise. Excitement is coming your way, but you must trust the process of letting go in order to get the most from this time. You may be ready to charge forward, but a little prudence can go a long way. Even if the path looks really wonderful, don't blindly charge ahead until you really know where you are going.

If I'm Dreaming... Please Don't Wake Me Up

2006-06-30T22:56:00.000-07:00

55-25.

Let me type that again.

55-25.

With today's win, the Tigers have hit the halfway mark. At 55-25, they are 30 games (!) above .500 which is rockin' enough, but even more significant, for this girl who lived and breathed the '84 season... they've now matched pace with the Bless You Boys.

It makes me honest-to-god weepy, how much I love this team. Detroit baseball is BACK. And like all the great teams in our history, now they have a song!

Who's Your Tiger?

Put Me In, Coach

2006-06-23T22:39:00.000-07:00

It's happened. I knew it would, eventually, but I didn't expect it would be today. And I didn't expect it would be the mailman.

I have been discovered.

Not whilst sipping a soda like Lana Turner at Schwab's, more like... oh the hubris of even making the comparison... ah what the hell. Like Honus Wagner (greatest shortstop ever for those of you who aren't baseball fans) throwing rocks across a trainyard. Signed on the spot he was. But in my case, it wasn't rocks, it was an actual baseball, and it wasn't a trainyard but instead the sidewalk in front of our house during my near-daily catches with Nathan.

You see... I have some mad baseball skillz that are readily apparent to anyone with eyes and a brain. Or at least to my mailman, who is recruiting more women for his postal service softball team. And damn it, that's good enough for me. When he said "Would you?" I of course said, "Yes, yes, a thousand times yes!" In retrospect, I think that scared him a bit, but I'm sure as he reflects on it he'll realize it was simple heartfelt enthusiam and love of the game.

I have dreams - oh, I have dreams. I'll certainly play shortstop, turn double-plays with ease, bat solidly near the middle of the lineup, and be carried off the field on the shoulders of my grateful teammates as I'm unanimously voted MVP after we win the leaugue championship. Pitchers will fear me. Batters will curse my fielding prowess. Players from other teams will try to woo me away (And other teams, if you're reading, let me nip that one in the bud. These people are postal workers. We don't want to piss them off, mmmkay?)

I hope we get uniforms. I'll wear high socks. High socks look SO cool.

The time is at hand. The world... erm... greater Seattle area is ready.

I will... I will rock you.

Happy Bloomsday!

2006-06-16T16:48:00.000-07:00

Damn. Yet another year has gone by without me organizing my Bloomsday reading of Ulysses. One of these years, I will put out the call to any Seattle folk who would like to get together to read the book from start to finish. I did it only once, in college, and it was a very cool experience.

That's horribly English major geeky, isn't it?

yes I said yes it is Yes.

Blognnui No More

2006-06-13T08:17:00.000-07:00

Someone really needs to update this blog, don't you think?

I see.

I guess since noone else is stepping up to the plate, it's all mine.

I honestly have no good excuse for the lack of time spent here, the lack of time spent writing PERIOD. Are things busy? Yeah, sure, what's new? Has *nothing* of note happened for the last few months? Well of course it has - there's been plenty to write about, several posts started and abandoned. I traveled to Peru, got my own monthly byline, was horrified by a massacre that happened at a house I know and love, watched my Tigers get off to an amazing start. My kids' baseball seasons have come and gone (Nathan's team made it all the way to the championship game before losing in a nailbiter), and we're just one week from the end of their school year. BJ and Tyler won the Amazing Race (TTOW!). My work-life has changed and more changes are on the horizon, my friends are having babies, and I watched a bear eat roadside dandelions at twilight.

Don't even get me started on politics.

So much prime blog fodder, the details now slipping into the muddled soup of the past, the emotions dampened, the edges blurred. Baby, once it's gone it's gone, gone all the way gone.

I saw Peter Mulvey last week at the Tractor, and as always happens with good music, and with Peter's in particular, I felt alive and smarter and desperate to make more of my time here, to create something that means something. I want to travel, to experience new places and people and things. I want to make beautiful things. I want to stop spinning all the time and to be where I am, not where I was or where I want to be.

So with two feet, I jump in here again and promise myself to let go of the guilt of the stories I missed telling. Grab the now and go.

Because these days it's all about the monkeys.

2006-05-23T10:37:00.000-07:00

Dance Groundsfolk! Dance!

Testing blip.tv blogging!

Formats available: Quicktime (.mov), Flash Video (.flv)

I Love Being a Mom

2006-05-15T08:56:00.000-07:00

Okay, yesterday was the Best. Mother's Day. Ever. The kidlets made me all kinds of sweet cards and pictures, stories and painted rock paper weights. We ate blueberry muffins, listened to the Tiger game (Tigers won! So did the Mariners!), ran a couple of errands and cleaned the garage while Stephen put some insulation in the attic to help keep the upstairs cooler. While manual labor might not sound like a great way to spend Mother's Day, it was exactly what I wanted to do... we've had so little time to spend on the house that all I asked for was a day of it with no complaints from kids that they were BORED.

Later in the day we did all go down to the park and Nathan got back on his bike a year after first removing the training wheels (with marginal success). After some initial stubbornness (on both mother and son's part), he started pedaling and didn't look back. The boy can now ride a bike and I am very proud.

We ended the day with salmon on the grill and a picnic in the backyard. Well, we actually ended the day with baths for two very grimy kids. Slept well, they did.

In keeping with the bike-riding theme, this poem came into my mailbox this morning. Made me predictably weepy.

Learning the Bicycle
by Wyatt Prunty

The older children pedal past
Stable as little gyros, spinning hard
To supper, bath, and bed, until at last
We also quit, silent and tired
Beside the darkening yard where trees
Now shadow up instead of down.
Their predictable lengths can only tease
Her as, head lowered, she walks her bike alone
Somewhere between her wanting to ride
And her certainty she will always fall.
Tomorrow, though I will run behind,
Arms out to catch her, she'll tilt then balance wide
Of my reach, till distance makes her small,
Smaller, beyond the place I stop and know
That to teach her I had to follow
And when she learned I had to let her go.

I'm not sure I needed to know this

2006-04-13T12:34:00.000-07:00

But I am sure that I want to share it with you.

My Eyeball Just Fell Out of Its Socket. What should I do?

I found the link to this informative and somewhat squicky article on Literally, A Weblog - a fun place for those of us who include among our pet peeves the boneheaded misuse of words and phrases.

A Lesson Learned

2006-03-06T20:39:00.000-08:00

A word of advice, gleaned from piping-fresh first-hand experience.

If you have the opportunity to do any travel by bus in Peru, and you're assigned to seats 1, 2, 3 or 4... ask very nicely whether you might be able to change your seat assignment. It doesn't much matter where, just do yourself a favour and request a higher seat number.

Why, you ask?

Peruvian driving is... how shall I put this? Insane and scary as hell. And if you're in the front row on the top level of a double-decker bus, you get to see the insanity up close and personal. "Safe following distance?" HA! Yield the right of way to pedestrians? HA HA! It is to laugh. Double-yellow means no passing? Thank you for that quaint... suggestion.

So unless you're looking for hours of nail-biting, seat-gripping, laughing-in-the-face-of-certain-death fun... move to the back of the bus.

Waiting...

2006-02-22T21:55:00.000-08:00

A quality I find very endearing about myself, as I imagine you do also dear readers, is that I truly believe that I may have been the person to download the billionth song on iTunes. I so firmly believe that things like that can happen that I actually skipped yoga class so that I could be among those attempting to snag the lucky number. I mean - someone did, right? Why not me?

I wonder how long it will take them to notify me? Maybe Steve himself will send the e-mail.

I'll let y'all know.

Musicky Meme

2006-02-08T17:09:00.000-08:00

My friend Betsy tagged me with this one and I figured - what the heck?

List seven songs you are into right now. No matter what the genre, whether they have words, or even if they’re any good, but they must be songs you’re really enjoying now. Post these instructions in your blog along with your seven songs. Then tag seven other people to see what they’re listening to.

1. The River Driver - Great Big Sea. My kids have been way into the newest Great Big Sea Album, The Hard and The Easy. It's a collection of traditional Newfoundland tracks, and this one happens to be acapella. Is it a bad thing that my children are going around singing "I'll eat when I am hungry and I'll drink when I am dry. Get drunk whenever I want to; get sober by and by"? Nah.

2. Captain Kidd - Great Big Sea. A theme here, no? And can you believe that instead of seeing GBS here in Seattle this weekend, we have to attend the kids school auction. Doh! Haven't told said children; they'd surely rebel.

3. Let 'Em Run - The Bills. Yummy.

4. Somewhere Only We Know - Keane. First heard this on Grey's Anatomy and immediately downloaded it from iTunes. It's a great little pop tune, hits all my buttons no matter how many times I listen to it.

5. Does He Love You? - Rilo Kiley. My dear blackwingedboy introduced me to RK, and I thank him muchly for it.

6. Snoopy vs. The Red Baron - Royal Guardsmen. Holy crap, this is an earworm. I accompanied Nathan on a school field trip a couple of weeks ago to see "You're a Good Man Charlie Brown." He asked some questions about Snoopy's nemesis, and I pulled this one up for him to listen to. And he does. Over. And over. And thus, so do we.

7. Imogen Heap - Headlock. I'm loving Imogen. I first became aware of her as the singer of "I'm A Lonely Little Petunia" on the Six Feet Under soundtrack and so liked her voice that I went looking for more.

Well that was fun! Now who to tag (and who might actually take me up on it)... let's try JBo, Lora, Toast, SandraDee, Ms. Boo, AP, and Anne. That should provide a nice variety. If you take me up on it, link back here so I'm sure to see what you have to say!

Modern Classic, Revisited

2006-01-31T13:57:00.000-08:00

Another grey rainy day + post-traumatic rejection funk + normal dark sense of humour = LOVE this

Sleepless In Seattle Trailer re-cut as a horror movie

Revel. Enjoy.

Exhaling, Or Always A Bridesmaid

2006-01-30T23:08:00.000-08:00

I've been metaphorically holding my breath for a couple of weeks now, waiting for some news, and it's made it difficult for me to feel much like writing. The news came today; not what I was hoping for, but at least it's movement. I'll try not to dwell in my little self-pity party for long, but let me just say that today I have a huge amount of empathy for anyone who has ever heard the words "if for any reason, Miss blahdy-blah is not able to fulfill her duties..."

Because while you'd like to think that there's some comfort to be taken in knowing you were almost good enough, there's no getting around the fact that being first runner up SUCKS no matter how "fabulous" you might be.

I've disabled comments on this post because I just need to vent and stomp my virtual foot for a bit without hearing about how one door closes and another opens. I don't want another door. Can't I just pick my own goddamn door and have it work out one time?